There are always 2 sides to every story. So far, you have all been hearing only my side of the story, which I grant you, would of course seem rather biased. I had written previously that even though Yellow Goddess would make me the star of her blog, I would not have "any interest or intention of reading what comes out of her head". That is still true - I'm not interested at all about her thoughts about me since I don't value her shallow, illogical opinions at all. I know myself well enough not to let her words pull me down.
So why this post then, you ask. Well, 4 days ago, 1 of my readers (whose name he doesn't want revealed) told me that he had just read Yellow Goddess' blog, and it was full of untrue and hateful things about me. I told him that I already know there will be such things about me without even needing to go there, but I really don't care what she has to write about me. This friend strongly feels though, that I should defend myself, and suggested that I translate her Mandarin posts about me into English and show you guys her heart.
After that conversation, I thought well...why not? I can practice reading Mandarin again (has been such a long time ago since I read enough Mandarin anyway), plus, I can present to my readers her story - unedited. Would that not be fair? To hear both sides? Besides, I'll be doing her a favour by translating the text which she doesn't want non-Mandarin speakers (aka the rest of the world outside of China) to read, no? So yes, she'll get some "air time" on my blog :o).
Well, let's start with the shortest one. Trust me, the first 1 she made just for me was extremely long that it will take days for me to translate (with the help of friends who will proof-read it to be sure it's accurate enough) for you guys, and she made another nice one for me yesterday which I will translate too. So yeah, let's start small first - an extract from the post she made on her 7 years wedding anniversary. How extremely sweet of her to think about me on her happy day :o). I feel so loved... .
"13AUG
7年了,真快呀.不知不觉中也是他的老婆7年了,还完成了生子大业.哈哈.我挺得意的.也应该得意一下的.我还不到30岁耶!蛮有成就感的.
嫉妒我们幸福一家的,乱砸blog文字的那个疯老女人,气得吐血,有种自己生一个呀.估计是做的孽太多了,想生生不出来, 哈哈,活该!! 她这种鸡肋,以他老公的花心,等他一找到更好的,加上她自己那无德无能又无貌,当弃妇的日子应该不远了.言论自由,不是吗,那我也有呀,看看,
她搬石头砸了自己的脚吧.
还是一句老话，己所不欲，勿施于人。"
"7 years already, it’s really fast. Without even realising I've been his wife for 7 years already, and even accomplished the goal of giving birth to a boy, a great undertaking. Ha ha. I’m rather proud of myself. And should be proud of myself. I’m not even 30 yet! I really have a great sense of achievement.
That family member who envies our happiness, that mad old woman who randomly pounds on her blog writing, angers me till I vomit blood. If she has guts then just give birth to one. I
reckon it’s because she has too many sins, so even when she wants to give birth she just can’t, ha ha, serves her right!! She, this kind of chicken rib, as accordingly to her husband’s
flirtateous nature, just wait till he finds an even better one, plus her own lack of goodness, capabilities and appearance, her days as a discarded woman should not be far already. Freedom
of speech, isn’t it, that I have too, wait and see, the stones she moves will smash her own feet.
And as the proverb goes, do not do to others what you do not want done to you."
***********************
Ok, ok…you non-Mandarin readers might be thinking "How can those few Chinese characters result in so many English words?!" Hee…hee…yes, it can. Chinese grammer is really one of the simplest of all the languages, so if I should translate directly word for word, the English version would hardly make much readable sense because vital connecting words, prepositions, etc would be missing… . Plus the fact that we use several alphabets in English just for 1 word, whereas a Chinese character takes up less space. Anyway, I have Mandarin-readers on my blog too, so they can easily verify if the English translation is correct or not.
Let's analyse this blog post of hers a bit, shall we? I'll like to talk about me being envious of her/their happiness. Now, I ask myself, what accomplishments of hers/theirs am I envious about? Try as I might, I can't seem to think of even 1. The below "items" popped into my head, but they had to be struck off the list almost as immediately as they got on it.
So, starting from material items to human:
Material
1. Their home
For one, I don't envy people who live in the middle of freakin' nowhere, especially when they're not even living in castles or mansions. I like my home right here in Copenhagen, and I wouldn't ever give it up for a place like theirs.
2. Her job
Not only does Yellow Goddess live in the middle of freakin' nowhere, she also works in the middle of freakin' nowhere! Should I be envious of that? I don't think so. I prefer to work in trendy Copenhagen with real people instead of manure-stenched areas with cows. In fact, if my memory serves me correctly, she was the one who wanted to work in the same big international/worldwide company as me, not the other way around. It was her CV she had sent to my manager, and it was Her Royal Highness herself who showed up at my office for the interview... . Unfortunately, the dream of my reality that she wanted was shattered, since she was a rejected applicant. Oh wait...I forgot - she was only checking out the place for her imaginary friend... . Sorry, my bad.
On top of the current job she has now, she also works an extra job on occasional weekends approximately every 3 months to earn more money for luxury. I one the other hand, just need 1 job to be able to live the same (or better). So again, no envy on my part, since I do like my weekends to be work-free.
3. Their car
When you live in the middle of freakin' nowhere, and work in the middle of freakin' nowhere, a car becomes a necessity. Since Martin and I live and work in trendy Copenhagen, we do not need a car. If we do decide to buy 1, it would be for luxurious reasons, not for necessity. Nice to have, but not need to have. However, can we afford to buy a car? Of course! We can pay for 1 in cold hard cash right now if we wanted to. But why would I want to waste money on a depreciating piece of metal which will merely be scrap in a matter of years?
Is that something for me to envy about? No. You see, though we don't own a car, what we do own is something worth way more than it - we have instead a holiday apartment right in the heart of Sunny Beach, Bulgaria! 62 sqm, brand new 2-room apartment, 10 mins walk to the beach, swimming pool and BBQ area just downstairs, 24-hr security service. If you want to talk about investment and using money wisely, then we talk about property, not cars.
4. Their travels
I love travelling, so I'll put this on "envy" list since I would be envious of someone who has travelled a LOT! But are Yellow Goddess and Bil that person? Unfortunately, no. Let's just look at the countries where they as a couple have travelled to and where we as a couple have travelled to for as long as I've known them:
Yellow Goddess+Bil
1. Spain, 2. Norway, 3. Sweden, 4. England, 5. Italy, 6. China, 7. Canada
Sheila+Martin:
1. Norway, 2. Sweden, 3. Finland, 4. England, 5. The Netherlands, 6. Singapore, 7. Malaysia, 8. Thailand, 9. Brazil, 10. Germany, 11. Latvia, 12. France, 13. Belgium, 14. Bulgaria (flights confirmed), 15. Italy (flights confirmed)
Er...did I lose them somewhere??? Am so far ahead that they seem quite a distance away behind... . No envy there.
Human
1. Her husband/their marriage
So she feels that I should be afraid of Martin discarding me 1 fine day after finding someone better? The truth is, it's the other way around - he's actually more afraid of me discarding him than I am of him discarding me. You see, Martin tells me all the time that he would not be able to live if I should ever leave him. I on the other hand, hardly ever say the same to him.
I think it's because I had forgiven him so much already in the past before our marriage and still continued to love him despite the wrongs he had done against me, that I've arrived at a place of inner peace within myself when it comes to my love for him. Therefore, if he should ever choose to leave me, I know I will still be able to live, simply because I make sure that my life is not dependent on his love for me.
Anyway, her husband ain't no angel himself when it comes to Asian women. Oh yes, I had seen the way he turned to ogle over an Asian girl who walked past him once when we were on the way to the fitness club last year (I was walking behind him, while Martin and 1 of Bil's friends were engaged in conversation). Man, his eyes were as big as saucers, and saliva was coming out of his mouth like a hungry wolf when I saw the expression on his face when pretty Asian girl walked by.
"You have heard that it is said that you should not commit adultry, But I say to you, whoever looks at a woman with lust in his heart, already has committed adultry in his heart." Matt. 5:27.
On top of that, who is the 1 who had always been sending my husband photos of random Asian women either by MMS or email? That's right - Bil. Was he trying to show off his "catch" or something? His prized trophies? Is 7 long years of marriage to the same woman boring him totally to death that he has to look hungrily outside the fence at the meat he can't chew on? Some women believe that in order to keep their men from leaving them, they should bear his child.
So...me envious of their marriage? Highly unlikely. Besides, I didn't marry my husband so that the Danish government won't kick me back to my motherland; she did.
2. Herself
Hmm...she mentioned my "lack of appearance", so I assume that I should be envious of hers. Hell, no! I don't consider ghostly-looking flat heads with flat thin hair, slanty dropy eyes, lack of eyebrows and curly eye-lashes, big round nose, thinly pursed lips, flat butt and roundish flabby tummies as a standard for beauty, especially when these features are sadly ALL on 1 person!
I've got a nice Indian-hertitage tan which Danes and most white people envy (I've been told several times), a head which is not flat, long lustrous and volumously thick hair which both guys AND girls like, I've got double eye-lids which enable me to put on eyeshadow, eyebrows which I can pluck and shape to my desire instead of pencil-drawing them on, curly eye-lashes (again thanks to my Indian heritage), full pouty lips without needing the help of botox, sexy round butt (as I've been told several times by men other than Martin, although only Martin's allowed to touch ;oP), and a flat tummy. I don't like my nose that much, but hey, though I'm not perfect, I'm not so imperfect that I would wish to look like someone as her who isn't even close to what I consider "beautiful".
Age-wise, I don't get why she's even calling me "old", when she's just 1 year and 3 months younger! Is her math really so bad that she can't calculate and see how insignificant the difference is? Oh, right....I forgot - she may (soon) be 29 years old, but in her mind, she's only 19. No wonder I seem like an old woman to her ;o). I remember when I was 19, how I thought 30 year old women were old too. The truth is, they're not old at all. Mature, yes - compared to a 19 year old, but old? No.
So....me envious of her? Big no! I'm sure she wishes I was, though.
3. Their son
Last on my so-called "envy list" - their son. She challenged that if I have the guts, then I should produce my own. Is that the reason to have a child? Guts? I thought you should have kids only when you are ready to have kids, not whether you have guts to do it or not.
I didn't even realise that I've been wanting a child when all this while I've been telling people that I don't! Is my "twin" out there telling you guys how I desparately want a child or something??? If she is, please shut her up because I really do not want to be a mum (right now, and maybe even ever) and Martin doesn't want to be a dad.
Yellow Goddess waited 6 years in her marriage before producing a child (whether planned or by accident, that's another story). I'm only on my 3rd year, so what's the rush? Oh...it's because I'm "old"....I get it... .
"I reckon it’s because she has too many sins, so even when she wants to give birth she just can’t." wrote Yellow Goddess.
Well...how about I tell you this: "If any one of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone at (me)." John 8:7.
To put it simply, EVERY SINGLE WOMAN who has ever given birth on planet Earth managed to do so even though they've had little or many sins in their lives....and Yellow Goddess is no heavenly exception. Even virgin mother Mary was, by definition, a sinner. So the number of sins and the ability to give birth are correlated? What a laugh! If this is really the case, then I'll be giving birth to TRIPLETS if Yellow Goddess managed even 1 child from her own sinful ways.
So am I envious of her Buddha son? Definitely not...since I don't see any logical reason to be envious of "something" I don't even want!
***************
You see how utterly difficult it is for me to be remotely envious of her? I'm still trying to find my "enlightment" on this. Oh what can it be....what can it be???
I can only conclude that the real envious person is really she... . No wonder she's hoping and looking forward to the death of my marriage with so much vigour, and hoping even for my own death:
"没有人事情做得比她好，那她就自己做啊，做死她好了，她这个死劳碌命！"
"Seems that nobody does things better than her, then she should just do them herself, better still, do until she dies, damn this workaholic woman!"
There's a name for such an unheathly kind of envy as displayed by her. It's called "malignant envy". In "malignant envy" we intend to destroy the object of envy.
Endnote:
I wrote earlier that "I'm not interested at all about her thoughts about me since I don't value her shallow, illogical opinions at all." She may also write out her opinions of Martin as negatively as she wants to and I won't even blink an eye. However, for her to accuse my husband of possibly having an affair today with his Thai ex-lover goes BEYOND despicable.
For example:
"21 July
听说她的宝贝兔子前日遇到他的泰国前任... "
"I heard her precious rabbit ran into his Thai ex-lover the day before yesterday... "
(she "heard" from who? The voices in her head???)
"10 Sept
看来两人的关系不佳,快要走到尽头了.不知是不是因为她宝贝兔子的泰国情人和他又在网上取得了联系?"
"Seems like these 2 people's relationship is not excellent, soon going to reach the end already, don't know if it's because her precious rabbit's Thai lover and him have obtained their online relations again?"
Bil had been proudly telling Martin that Yellow Goddess would never stoop to my level. He's right, she didn't stoop to my level at all. She went way below it! Again I say: malignant envy.
