Number 14

Right, I just heard today that an ex-colleague is pregnant too, and due in December this year. So yeah, just keep adding your names to my list, ok? C'mon now...keep it coming...don't be shy.

Silent mode

We all want to have happy marriages, but even the most wonderful marriage or relationship has the occasional arguments/disgreements/quarrels. If it doesn't, then something is wrong, and my guesses are:

• Both partners don't really care about each other (living separate lives)
• Both partners don't speak each other's language, or a common language
• Both partners are dead

Martin and I are happily married, but we are not perfect, so we do have disagreements now and then. We have had major arguments in our history together, but these are thankfully rare and far between. He usually buys me flowers to apologise whenever we have one of these major arguments, so if any of you come by to our place and see flowers on the table, then you can guess why ;o).

But like I said, these are quite rare - the major arguments and therefore also the flowers on the table ;o). Hmm...I think I should tell him to stop associating lovely flowers with our major arguments; such a pity for a girl to get flowers from her man only after a fight!

Anyway, our disagreements are usually about minor things which are easily solved or easily forgotten. I would say in a month, we have around 2 or 3 such disagreements, which is not a lot at all considering that we have 30-31 days each month. I had a relationship once with a guy called Kim, and my goodness! We were having arguments/disagreements quite constantly, like every 2 or 3 days! That was an unhealthy relationship, so it was good that it ended after 6 months.

Whenever Martin and I have a major argument, and I don't feel like I'm getting through to him even after our discussion, I tend to do 1 thing - I go into silent mode. I ignore him, I don't talk to him, I push him away if he tries to hold me, I don't reply his emails or sms'es when we're at work... . When he tries to kiss me in the morning before going to work, my back is turned towards him. The situation between us kinda looks like this:

I know it's not good to go to bed without being at peace with each other, but sometimes you can't help it because if the argument happens just before bedtime, then you can't really stay up late to discuss and conclude it when you need to get your sleep so as to get up early for work the following day, right?

Fortunately, the silent treatments don't last for more than a day. We usually manage to make up and come to a peaceful solution before going to bed again, such that the situation looks more like this instead:

Ah yes...that's Martin snoring away and holding on to me, while our dear Tiggy cuddles next to us ;o). Oh! "Who's Tiggy?" you ask. Well, he's not our pet as you might think, but more like a friend. He does talk, and he does torment Martin now and then, so he's very real indeed. They have a competitive love-hate relationship with each other...something to do with "male territory". Anyway, here's Martin and Tiggy when they love each other:

I think Tiggy looks a little shocked at the affection in that picture. We're a weird couple, aren't we ;o)?

A date Down Under

Martin and I went on a dinner date today :o). I'm talking about a real proper dinner date at a fancy restaurant and with just the 2 of us without our kids... . Oh wait, we don't have kids ;o).

Anyway, it's been quite a while since we've been on a date like that. Yes, married couples can (and should) still date each other now and then. It doesn't always have to be at a fancy restaurant, but it should at least be doing something together outside of home and just the 2 of you. Quality time with each other while keeping the romance alive ;o).

There wasn't anything to celebrate today really. A couple of weeks ago, I did spontaneously say to Martin "Hey! Let's go have dinner tonight at the Greek restaurant close by!" We've never been there yet because they were always closed whenever we wanted to check it out, so I thought it would be a good idea to try again (plus, I was kinda lazy to cook ;o)).

Martin's reply though, was disappointing. "You want to go there now?!? But I'm tired, so let's just stay home and find something in the fridge to cook." Talk about the most unromantic answer of the year!

So yeah, I guess he kinda felt bad about it, so he suggested that we go out for dinner tonight instead, to an Australian restaurant :o). Good thing pay day was today ;o).

Strike 3! You're OUT!

Strikes, strikes, strikes. This year has been a year of strikes. Some months ago, we had the SAS cabin crew who refused to go to work until their demands were met. Now, since yesterday, we have some bus drivers going on strike as well. It will end only on Friday at the earliest, since the "negotiation meeting" this morning was not successful.

Airline cabin crew goes on strike = cancelled flights = frustrated passengers.
Bus drivers go on strike = cancelled buses = frustrated Sheila.

I normally take a direct bus to work. It is a 35 min journey, but it is at least direct and hassel-free with minimum walking time. I have several other bus/train options that I can try too, but they are neither direct nor hassel-free, and besides, they all take around the same time anyway. When you live in a cold country with the dreaded winter season, you'd appreciate having a direct bus to and from work.

Anyway, as luck would have it, MY PRECIOUS DIRECT BUS TO WORK IS ON STRIKE!!! Well ok, the bus itself is not on strike, but the bus drivers who drive "my" bus belong to the union that is on strike. Man, that was a mouthful; it was faster to just say "my bus is on strike" since all you smart people reading my blog will know what I mean ;o).

So yeah, there are around 40 bus numbers affected by this, and most of those which I could have tried to use as alternatives are amongst the "strikers". "Hmm...maybe I can take this bus instead...oh, it's on strike too... . How about this one? Oh, no go... . Hey, how about...oh, forget it! I'll just call in 'sick' to work then!"

Oh well, I was late by ½hr at work yesterday because I didn't know about the strike. Martin didn't inform me about it even though he had left earlier for work (normally with the same bus number I take). He said he had FORGOTTEN (he and his short term memory). However, I have no excuse to be late for work now until Friday, so I am trying out various possible alternatives to get to work, which means I have to give myself ½hr of "buffer" time in case of unforseen delays on the new routes I try.

Yesterday's way of getting to work is definitly out of the question since it involved 2 different buses, a train transfer and a ½hr walk from the central station all the way to my office. HALF AN HOUR'S WALK! That's far too much just for getting to WORK. If I spend ½hr to walk around the mall to shop, then it's a different thing. Would not even mind TWO hours for that ;o).

So I tried a different way this morning. I just needed to take 1 bus, and there was a 20 min walk involved with parts of it through a park. This way wasn't as bad as yesterday's walk and multiple transport transfers. Unfortunately, 20 mins of walking is still too long for me, and if it was raining as much as it has been lately, then the compulsory walk through the muddy park would have been a damper.

The "winner" will be the way I took home this evening. It involves 2 different buses, and the total journey time from our apartment door to my office door is about the same, but the walking time is "just" a little under 10 mins. Therefore, WINNER ;o)!

You (guys especially) might think I am being fussy about the walking, but I can tell you that:

1. Heals are NOT meant for long distance walking.
2. Heals are NOT EVEN meant for short distance walking in Copenhagen!

Here's what I mean:

My lovely shoe...

Walking innocently down the streets of Copenhagen...

Gets beaten up like this!

And eaten up alive like this!

Every time my shoes get stuck between the cobbled stones, not only do they get damaged, but I also get pulled back a little such that I might seem like someone with a sudden body spasm or something. Not very elegant... .

Whoever came up with the idea of cobbled streets was in high probability someone within the male species... . And strikes should be banned!!! Grrr... .

Baby epidemic

Remember that I wrote on Friday 08 June that "I know at least 12 friends/acquaintances/colleagues/Yellow Goddess who have already given birth this year, or are due to give birth this year."? Well guess what? Make that 13 people. The list just got longer last Saturday. Is there really a baby epidemic going on?!?!

Just for the sake of recording, I'm going to make a list of all the people I know who had given birth this year or are due to give birth this 2007 year:
Of course, there is also Princess Mary (Crown princess of Denmark) who had given birth earlier this year too, to a baby princess, but since I don't know her personally, she shan't be on my list ;o). Hmm...seems like there are more girls than boys at the moment... . Let's see if we get it a bit more balanced as we await the next few births.

Anyway...to everyone on the list who is living in Denmark: thank you for giving birth so that I don't have to worry about who's going to pay taxes for my pension in the future!!! Hee...hee... ;o).

By the way, if you had just given birth and are tired of parenthood already, here's a neat way to get rid of your baby:

When you go to a birthday party, just roll the pram with your baby in it to the gift table and leave it there amongst the other gifts. It would be good if the baby goes to the lucky birthday person with a start up kit comprising of practical things such diapers, some clothes, a pacifier and some milk formula. Oh, maybe the birth certificate and medical records too... ;o).

2 parties 1 day

It's been a loooooooong day today. Well, first of all, I didn't go to bed until 04:00hrs this morning as I was busy wrapping up presents and printing out cards. Then we had to get up around 10:30hrs to get ready for Martin aunt's 60th birthday party at 11:30hrs. Good thing is was at a restaurant close to our apartment... .

The birthday "girl" and me

We managed to get home just when rain came pouring down! After 1½hrs of rest, we were out the door again, this time to a friend's 32nd birthday. It was also midsummer day today (the day with the longest daylight in the year), which also happens to be the eve of Saint John's Day (known as "Sankt Hans dag" in Denmark).

The traditional high point of this "Sankt Hans" eve is celebrated by lighting up a bonfire and burning a witch. If someone is suspected of doing witchcraft, she is put on a list which is collated during the year up till midsummer, and this person is then sentenced to burning at the stake on the 23rd of June. Yes...Denmark is a barbaric country indeed, burning people like that every midsummer... .

Ok, ok...the above is not entirely true ;o). They did in fact burn suspected witches at the stake during the medieval period, but that does not happen for real here anymore. They now have a witch doll at the stake instead:

Anyway, they didn't manage to light up the bonfire at the place we were at since the rain had wet the dead branches earlier today so it took forever for the fire to get burning (even though diesel was used as the firestarter). Martin and I didn't want to wait any longer as it was getting too late already, so we left with a couple of friends while the rest stayed back. We did get to see some huge fireworks display before we left though, so that was something at least.

To be honest, I don't know why burning "witches" is something to celebrate about in this day and age. Many innocent people had died in the past because of this, yet we are celebrating this very heathen ritual like it's something we should be proud of. It's almost like wanting to celebrate the holocaust or something, and I'm pretty sure that would not be given the "seal of approval" even with dolls used instead of real people... .

Oh well, that's tradition for you. Now that the longest day is over, the sun will rise later and set earlier :o(. We won't notice the days getting shorter and shorter until only a couple of months from now, so for the moment, it is just psychologically depressing to know that we're going to get less sunlight little by little each day. I just hope the sun will show itself more from behind the rain clouds this summer, otherwise I'll have to carry my big umbrella everywhere I go :o(.

I'm off to bed now. Will leave you with a picture of Martin and me from his aunt's birthday party ;o). Hey, this would be our first "couple" picture on this blog! Proof that he's my man ;o).

He's not perfect

Martin said that I write too many good things about him on my blog, so he's afraid that you guys might get the wrong idea that he's "Mr Perfect". Hey, just digressing a little; wasn't there a WWF wrestler called "Mr Perfect"? Kinda rings a bell... .

But yeah, it's true that I have not written much about his flaws, and I only have 1 bad picture of him during his wild hair days. He doesn't think that was a flaw, though, despite what my mini poll statistics based on your votes show... .

So this post is to settle once and for all that my hubby is not at all perfect. Here are some of his flaws:

Flaw#1. He makes a lot of noise in the morning

I don't like getting up early in the morning, so Martin is usually up before me by about an hour. I don't know if it's because my ears are sensitive in the mornings or what, but I tend to hear his heavy footsteps quite loudly, amongst other noises.

*STOMP* *STOMP* *STOMP* into the bathroom.
*STOMP* *STOMP* *STOMP* into the bedroom.
*SLAM!* (cupboard door or drawer closing)
*STOMP* *STOMP* *STOMP* into the kitchen.
*CLINK* *CLINK* *CLANK* *CLANK* as he eats his cereals.
*STOMP* *STOMP* *STOMP* into the living room.
*STOMP* *STOMP* *STOMP* back into the bedroom to kiss me goodbye and say he loves me.
*STOMP* *STOMP* *STOMP* out the bedroom.
*SLAM!* (main door closes)

Phew! Peace and quiet at last once the door slams shut!!!

Seriously, it sounds like a big, fat elephant is rampaging around our apartment every morning!!! If I weren't too lazy to get up in the mornings, I would have got out of bed with a rifle in my hands to try and shoot it down!

Flaw#2. He has a very bad memory

Actually, he has a very good memory, but it is used to remember useless things like movie quotes, names of actors/actresses whom I have never heard of before, names of directors who produced this and that movie, approximate year when the movie was released, etc, etc related to movies.

Therefore, since his good but maybe limited memory space is being used up in the above way, he has no memory left for remembering more useful things like appointment/event dates, things I told him some days before, things we did some days before, etc, etc.

But then again, to some extent, this is a good thing because it means that he won't remember if I've been mean to him ;o). Of course, being the good wife that I am, I'm never mean to him ;o). You see, if he doesn't remember it, then it simply never happened....so I've got a clean record ;o).

It's been said that drinking too much beer can cause memory loss. I wonder how much beer he had been drinking during his wild student days... .

Flaw#3. He gets cranky when his sugar level is low

This would not have been on his list of flaws, if it wasn't for the fact that his sugar level is usually "conveniently" low whenever we are out shopping eg. after work. Not good in a girl's book. Luckily, there is a remedy for his crankiness - a bar of Snickers to appease the "kid", and we're on a roll again.

We don't always manage to get him his Snickers though, so then I have to go through the shopping trip all stressed. Bad, bad flaw, this is. But ok, if he's not cranky, then he's a very patient man during my shopping trips :o).

Flaw#4. He doesn't put things back where he took them from

One minute the tweezers are where they should be, and the next minute they are where they shouldn't be. If I didn't know that he was using them before, I would have thought they grew legs to do a walkabout! Sometimes when he keeps forgetting to put them back where he takes them, I hide them away from him, so the next time he wants to use them, he'll go "Where are the tweezers?" and I shrug my shoulders and go "I don't know. Where did you put them last time?"

Then he learns next time to put them back where he took them from...for some time at least, until his memory starts to fail him again (refer to Flaw#2 above).

***********************************************

So yeah, as you can see, he's not perfect ;o). What? You think the list is too short?!? Well...I do want to stay married you know (he reads my blog sometimes too), so you can't expect me to list down every single flaw ;oP. Besides, we all have flaws, so when you are married to someone, you'll just have to overlook some of them in order to live peacefully with each other :o).

But ok, if you think a couple more flaws to this list would make him more human, then here are Flaws#5 and #6:

Flaw#5. He burps

Flaw#6. He farts...loudly and dangerously

So there you have it; he's human.

100!

Yay! My visitor counter has hit 100! Whoever was my 100th reader (one of my faithful ones, I suppose?), I have 3 "words" for you:

*MUAH* *MUAH* *MUAH* !!!

Foolin' around with HTML

Some of you quick people might notice some new changes to the look of my blog :o). Nothing major really....not yet, at least. I've just been trying out stuff and foolin' around with whatever features I can add or change to enhance my blog, but it's really not that easy when you don't know the HTML language :o(.

But yeah, I'm just doing what I can (or what I think I can) so let's see what happens. I'm still not too successful in figuring out how to add some tab menus to my blog page... . Had found some help online, but man, those HTML codes are mind boggling! I would be some secret FBI agent or something if I can manage to decipher them!

Martin's not much help either :o(. He's more of a "hardware" kinda computer geek, so he knows how to set up and fix computers and everything that a system administrator is good at, but he knows only basic HTML (he's not a programer). Right now, he definitely knows more than what I know, so he can help me with some simple things, but not anything complicated. Bil is actually the one who is the expert in programing, but I don't think I'm going to ask him to help me enhance my blog...for obvious reasons.

Anyway, at the rate I'm self-learning these things, who knows, I might in the very near future become more of an expert than Martin in this area ;o). I won't need an IT nerd for a husband anymore then...*hee* *hee*. No, just kidding - he'll still be useful to me...like making me my cup of tea ;o).

Oh well...if any of you reading my blog are experts in HTML, then there is a damsel in distress here! I can be very stubborn, so if nobody out there can help me, then I won't blog anymore until I find a solution on to how to make tab menus on Blogger!!! *Hmpf* ;oP.

The Bodyguard

What a weekend! It had been raining like crazy all day on Saturday, and on and off today... . I don't hope this is the end of summer.

Yesterday's rain from the front side of our apartment

We were supposed to go to Tivoli or Bakken (amusement parks in Copenhagen) yesterday afternoon with my parents-in-law, Bil, Yellow Goddess, their baby son and Yellow Goddess' parents who are visiting them for 1½ months. Well, I don't know if Martin and I were supposed to join them, but Martin's mum invited us anyway.

Well, since it rained cats and dogs pretty much all day, the outing was cancelled. Thank goodness for that, since I'll admit that I wasn't too keen in spending some hours in such a small group with Yellow Goddess. If we were in a bigger group, then it'll be easier to keep my distance, but in such a small group, I doubt I'll be able to take her "oh-so-high-and-mighty" nonsense for even just a couple of hours... .

So yes...we had a quiet and lazy Saturday afternoon at home instead. I guess that was needed, since I was out on my company's party the night before so I was pretty tired after that even though I arrived home unusally early (2am)... .

I'm glad that Martin is the type of husband who doesn't mind doing things like picking me up at the bus-stop when it's too late for me to walk home alone. We don't have a car that he could just drive and fetch me, so for him to insist on picking me up (and doing it) is actually quite a task.

He would have to stop his movie (if he's watching one when I call him to tell him that I'm on my way home), get dressed, get his jacket on, get out in the cold (it can still be around just 10 deg C at night during Danish summer), and walk to the bus-stop. The usual bus-stop close to our apartment is just a mere 5 mins walk away, but I had to take a different (night) bus on Friday after the party so it meant that he had to walk 15 mins instead to get me, and then 15 mins back together with me, but there was not 1 second of a grumpy look on his face. I was the one who should feel honoured that he would go through the trouble to pick me up after my happy partying, but it seemed instead that he was the one who felt honoured to be given the chance to protect his precious princess (me, of course ;oP).

He could have just told me to walk home on my own and be safe, or he could have just not tell me to call him when I'm on my way home, or he could have told me to take a cab home, but no, he always insists to meet me at the bus-stop when it gets too late. He says that he would never forgive himself if something should ever happen to me just because he "allowed" me to walk home on my own late at night, even if the bus-stop is just 5 mins away.

If it gets too "late" however (eg. 4am or 5am in the very early morning), then I ususally just take a cab home since I don't want to wake him from his sleep to come pick me up at the bus-stop. I guess that's the good thing about living in Copenhagen then - it does not cost too much to take a cab ride from the city centre to home - around 130 DKK (S$35), which I know is a LOT in Singapore for just a 10 min cab ride, but in Danish standards, it is affordable enough if you do it just once in a long while.

So yeah, you guys should thank my wonderful bodyguard of a husband for making sure I get home safe so that I can blog and give you something to read ;o).

Oil and water don't mix

I have a company party tomorrow evening! We normally have 3 parties a year - a pre-season party, a post-season party, and a Christmas party. Hmm...since our high season at work has already started, then the party tomorrow cannot really be called a "pre-season" party, now can it? Oh well, a party's a party... .

For those who do not know, I work at an incoming travel agency here in Copenhagen. I've been working with this agency for 9 years now, so it's definitely longer than my marriage ;o). Our office has a very international environment, and that is something I like very much. We have only 2 Danes out of 15 people in our Copenhagen office! Only 2! One of them is from an island called "Bornholm", so whether he's considered a Dane or not is questionable ;o)... .

I'm the only 1 from Singapore, though :o). The rest are from China, Japan, Sweden, Finland, Taiwan, Brazil and Korea...so we're pretty mixed even though we are just 15.

Anyway, I have colleagues coming and going all the time in this travel industry. Sometimes it's sad to see them go, but on the other hand, it is also great to meet new people... . I've made some very good friends at work, most of whom I still keep in contact with even after they've left... .

I don't know about you guys, but there is something which I personally stand quite strongly against, and that is recommending friends or family members to vacancies at the office I work in. It is one thing is to make good friendships with colleagues, but it is totally something else to make good colleagues with friends/family. Especially with family. I mean, if something should happen at work, you will still have to face your family member, or if something should happen in the family, then you will still have to be professional to each other at work. Friendships and relationships can be easily broken at work, so I prefer to keep these separate. Oil and water don't mix either.

Which is why it puzzled me (and I'm actually still puzzled) as to why the Yellow Goddess had at one point in time wanted to apply for a positiion at my office. Our "in-law" relationship was not the best already at that time, but still she wanted to give it a shot. Can you imagine working from Mondays to Fridays, 8 hours each day, with somebody whom you don't get along well already outside of work, and then seeing that person sometimes during the weekends as well?! I'd be more married to her than her own husband then!

The worst of it was that she was quite sneaky to get information from me about the vacancy. According to her email to me, she was recommending her cousin for the job I had mentioned:


The blue text had been edited to protect the names of the people mentioned, and the red text is just me being mean to point out some grammar mistakes (eg. the part of her not having my phone - of course she doesn't have my phone! Duh...). Although you can't see it in the above mail, she had signed off very formally with her first name and last name, as if I didn't know that we share the same married last name or something... . That, plus the fact that she didn't tell my manager that she was my sister-in-law (she just said she knew me) says a lot of our very distant relationship... .

Anyway, she might as well have been honest and say that maybe the job was something for her too, instead of using me and her cousin as means to her sneaky ends... . To cut a long story short, it was a very good thing that she didn't get the job in the end (and that she didn't quit her current job after the interview).

The funniest part though, was that she gave the lamest excuse I had ever read in my life in reply to her job rejection standard email. Something in the lines of "It's ok, I wasn't interested in the job anyway. I only wanted to check out the place for a friend of mine....blah, blah, blah."

WTH?!? Was her friend in a wheelchair or something that she couldn't go down to the office to take the interview herself??? Or was she really such a good (imaginary) friend that the great and all powerful Yellow Goddess would drive all the way down from the middle of nowhere to Copenhagen to "check out the place" for her???

Oh well...at least she made me laugh that day ;o). How silly to burn one's bridges like that though. Very professionally done... .

By the way, just for the record, her cousin did have an interview too, a week after Yellow Goddess. Although she knew that Yellow Goddess was going to apply for the job too, she was nevertheless surprised to hear when Yellow Goddess had her interview because she did not mention the date of it even to her dear cousin. And even though her cousin didn't get the job either, at least she was adult enough not to give lame excuses... .

Anyway, I've learnt my lesson: never put your hand in the lion's cage to give it food. It'll take the food, but it'll also bite your hand off in the process.

"Straight from the mouth"

Guy A: My wife always gets the last word in our arguments.
Guy B (nodding in agreement): Yeah, mine too.
Guy C: Well, I don't know about you guys, but I always get the last word in our arguments.
Guys A and B (looking at Guy C in envy): Wow...really???
Guy C: Yeah. My last words are always "Yes, mam!"

Gentlemen are gems

I am all for equal rights for men and women; at work, at school, at home, in public, etc. If a woman has the same qualifications as a man, and the same experiences, then why shouldn't she have the same salary? At home, if both husband and wife are working full-time, then why shouldn't the household chores be shared?

I read an article once which said that Danish men make good husbands. It had something to do with that most Danish men (there are exceptions, of course) help out with the household chores and with bringing up the kids. I don't know yet about the part of helping to bring up the kids since we have none, but concerning sharing the load of household chores, I do agree.

However, being "equal" is not the same as being "the same". Let's face it - men and women, though "equal", are not eg. physically "the same". We don't always think in the same way either.

That is why I do not like radical feminism that takes the "equality" fight a bit out of context... . Why can't a man be allowed to open doors for us? Or carry our heavy grocery bags? Or pull out the chair for us before we sit at the table? Do we have to snap at them and tell them that we are capable of doing these ourselves? C´mon, give the gentleman a break! Saying "Thanks," with a smile is way easier (and kinder) than a frown and some angry words... . I mean, if we really want to be equal and the same, then how about finding a way to make men take ½ of the pregnancy period too?! Nature won't allow us to do so, right? Then let's just allow them to open the door for us and carry the heavy bags, okay? Otherwise whatever muscle they have left in them will just become fats.

So yeah, even though Danish men make good husbands because they share an equal role at home with their wives, they don't make very good gentlemen. I'm not talking so much about male friends who know you personally, since they would normally be polite and gentlemanly anyway as friends should be to each other. However, the average male stranger in the street may not always hold the door open for a lady stranger, or offer a lady stranger the next available seat in the bus if both are standing close to it. I've experienced doors almost slamming in my face, and guys just quickly resting their butts on bus seats the minute the opportunity allows them to, without bothering to ask any ladies close by first if they'd like to have it.

I don't blame them entirely for losing their gentlemanly manners since Danish women want to show that they are "equally" strong enough to open the doors themselves, or "equally" capable of standing throughout the bus trip. If I were a guy who gets a lecture of women equality instead of just sweet and simple "Thanks," then I'll probably just think for myself too.

"Hmm....my woman wants to show that she's as strong as me, well, let her take the heavier load then!"

"Wow...she did pretty good last time, so let's increase her load!"

"It's great to be a man these days! Our women do ALL the work, AND are still the ones getting pregnant! Suckers!"

Anyway...it's good that Martin is gentlemanly enough... . Ok, he doesn't always open/hold the door for me to let me pass through first, but at least he always carries the grocery bags whenever we are out shopping for food together... . If we have 1 bag, he takes the 1 bag. If we have 2 bags, he takes the 2 bags. If we have 3 bags, he wants to know if we're having a party or something... ;o). No, just kidding; then I take the lightest bag.

Women however, should not overdo this and think that "my husband should carry ALL my bags, no matter what bag it is." Imagine making your husband carry your feminine handbag for you! It's not cool, and it makes him look like 2 things: gay, or a slave. Give the man some pride! Just because it is eg. very normal in China for a guy to carry the handbags of the goddesses there does not mean that it is therefore cool for him to do so. Not there, and especially not here in the west where it would seem highly abnormal! A man-bag/purse would probably be better for him to carry around then (if it looks less feminine than an actual female handbag, that is)... .

Rule of thumb: it is okay for a man to hold his woman's handbag for a short time when needed (eg. if she needs to buckle her shoes, or go to the ladies at a public place while he waits for her, or put on her winter coat, or try something on in the changing room), but he has pretty much burnt his manhood at the stake by carrying the handbag for her while she's doing nothing but simply walking next to him! When I see such a thing, I don't think "Wow, she really knows how to train her man!". What I do think instead, is "That man is so henpecked that he's not a rooster anymore but a hen!"

Anyway ladies - if your handbag's too heavy for you to carry yourself, then empty it and see what you don't need to have with you. Half the contents are probably junk anyway. If it's still heavy, then you have 2 options: bear the weight of your own load, or change the handbag to a more manly backpack or laptop-looking bag if you intend your man to carry it for you.

Danish summer

I love it here in Denmark when we have a good summer... . Feels like being in Singapore again, just without so much humidity. It's not easy to sleep during warm nights, though, since we don't have any air-cons at home (most Danish homes have heaters instead, for the longer winter months). At least we have a ceiling fan, so it's better than nothing... .

It's also great with the long daylight during summer time... . Even though I've been leaving the office "late" these couple of weeks due to the high tourist season (and by "late", I mean around 19:30hrs, which is nothing compared to "late" by Singapore standards), it still feels like I'm getting home early since it's still so bright. Hmm... then again, I'm always at the office at 10:00hrs, so if I want to leave earlier at a "normal" time, I can always get up earlier. I hate getting up early, though. I do it only if I really have to.

Anyway, see how bright it still is at 21:15hrs today!

Shot taken from my balcony :o). The sun is going to set later and later until sometime in mid-June (mid-summer night), then it will slowly but surely start to get darker and darker again... . You won't feel it until around late September or beginning October, though. I'll try to remember to upload a picture when it's 16:00hrs in winter so you can see the big difference... .

Anyway, summer time means grill time in Denmark, so we were out grilling last Saturday at Caryn and Henrik's place (the parents of the 2 boys we helped to babysit last Thursday). Caryn is Malaysian Chinese (good friend of mine whom I used to work together with) and her husband, Henrik, is Danish. Their sons, Thomas and Nicolai, are really adorable :o). In fact, if you remember Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom where there was this Asian kid (Jonathan Ke Quan) who was Indy's sidekick (Shorty), then we've found his look-alike in the form of Thomas!

Well...don't know if you guys agree, but Martin and I think he looks like "Shorty" (the one on the left). By the way, in case you are wondering, we did not serve Thomas ANY alcohol despite the number of wine glasses in front of him ;oP! I know the picture makes him look like an alcoholic kid, but it's the only one I have of him from the BBQ last Saturday... .

Ok, fine...if you guys don't want to believe me, I'll just leave now with a sunshiny picture of myself then (something which seems to be missing from MY blog besides that tiny profile picture I have of me).

Naughty Rabbit

Martin was born in 1975, which was the year of the Rabbit according to the Chinese horoscope... . Calling him "Honey bunny" is therefore very appropriate in many ways, but there's one thing I have to be careful about:

By the way, when I wrote that "Calling him "Honey bunny" is therefore very appropriate in many ways", it should be understood that only I am allowed to call him that, okay ;oP?

Anyway, judging from how rabbits like to procreate, perhaps I should really consider abstinence as the best birth control method ;o).

Good hetro fashion need not be metro fashion

I like guys who are well-dressed, whether casually, or at formal events. I know we women always say that guys have it so easy since all they need to do is put on a shirt or t-shirt and a pair of jeans or trousers, while we on the other hand have to sometimes think a day in advance as to what to wear (or sometimes even WEEKS/MONTHS, depending on what kind of event we are attending)!

Guess what, guys? It's true - you male species do have it that easy, so the least you can do with such an easy task is to get your colours coordinated! Can? So, instead of waiting and complaining that we are taking forever to get dressed, you can try to be constructive by taking advantage of the extra time you have to check yourselves out in the mirror and make sure that your clothes match well ;oP.

Don't leave home with mis-matching colours like this:

Or like this:

Also, I know how sometimes you're in a rush and all, so you might just open the cupboard and grab the lucky winner, but at least keep the old and worn-out-looking clothes at the very back of the cupboard then. Or put them in the "home clothes" section so that you're sure you won't grab it by mistake for an outing like the case below...

Sorry, what did you say?

"It's all good"?!?

No, sorry Bil...it's not "all good". Oops! Did I reveal who the guy in the pictures is? My bad... .

Anyway, I thought part of the benefits for a guy to have a wife is so that she can help improve a man's colour-blindness when it comes to picking out his clothes. Of course, I don't mean that she should literally pick out his clothes for him since he's not a baby, but there are ways to help him pick out his own clothes without him realising that you're pointing him in the right direction. Soon enough, he'll be able to do it entirely on his own.

You can start by helping him clear out his wardrobe. Get rid of the old and worn out t-shirts, sweaters, trousers, etc. Do it together with him, so that he shares a big part in this project, and also so that he can learn something.

Then, go shopping with him a few times so that you can help him look for something good. Before long, he'll get into the habit of going to the right shops, and looking out for the right things... .

Birthdays, anniversaries and Christmas are good (but not the only) opportunities to get him tasteful clothings. Branded goods are not "must-haves" because those are not necessarily what makes a man look good.

Also, I really do not recommend getting him so-called fashion accessories such as Louis Vuiiton man-bags for eg. his birthday. They are FAR from "manly", so just bag that idea. Poor Bil was the laughing stock at his office (which had all males) for as long as the number of days he carried his new Louis Vuiiton man-bag to work, which was about a week. Waste of money, target of ridicule. Guys, if you ever get a branded man-bag or some other un-manly accessory as a gift from your wife or girlfriend, be careful - she's angry with you about something.

Ladies, do not metrosexualise your man, no matter how tempting it is for you to show off your "wealth" to the rest of the world!!!

One thing is to make him look good, another thing is to make him look like he might be gay. Please, please pleeeease do not make him look like this:

I mean, sure - assuming they are genuine, it would seem like you are able to spend that kind of money easily, but is the money really wisely spent when it makes you look like a joke? If you seriously don't know what to do with your money, my bank account number is.... ;o). I'll then help you look instead like this:

Babysitting, and now just sitting

We were parents to two boys today for 4 hours. Well, to be exact, Martin was a "single dad" for the first 2 hours since I didn't come home from work until 8pm, and once I got home "mummy" took over for the last 2 hours... .

The good news is, he survived :o). And so did the boys. I wasn't sure at first on how it'll go when I wasn't around, but I guess as long as he didn't need to feed them, shower them or change diapers, then it was okay (the boys were aged 4 and 2½ years).

For me, I've been "babysitting" since I was 13, so no problem. My first sister, Claudia, was born just 3 days after I turned 13, and my youngest sister, Tania, was born on the year I turned 17. I had gone through pretty much EVERYTHING when it comes to bringing up kids, except being pregnant, giving birth, breastfeeding and being financially committed.

I had helped changed their diapers and nappies, cleaned their butts, gave them baths, dressed them up, sang them to sleep, fed them, played with them, scolded them, potty trained them, watched them grow, taught them, etc, etc, etc. Not just once, mind you, but twice over, since it was pretty much the same cycle and routines with my youngest sister.

They are wonderful teenagers now, my sisters. Funny how the first one is soon 17, and the youngest is 13 - the very ages I was when each of them came into my life. My whole teenage years, I was like a "second mother" to them, since as the oldest sister, it naturally became my responsibility to help my mum take care of them... .

Don't get me wrong - I enjoyed the experience and would never give it up, even though sometimes it could be trying. It is amazing to see them grow to become who they are now from the very first day they entered this world. However, it also allowed me to know that being a parent involves a LOT of time and sacrifice of all sorts; not just when they're children, but also when they are teenagers, you'll have to deal with them a whole different way!

This is mainly why I am not planning to have kids right now, if ever at all (besides the fact that petrol prices are still sky high ;o)). I'm just SO not ready for my own, and besides, I had pretty much been through it all already...twice.

People say that "Oh, but it's different when it's your own child," to which I say "Yes, that's true. The difference is that you'll have to be more committed, sacrifice more and be more involved in their lives if they are your own kids." I'm therefore all the more not ready for that right now, even though the joys of being a parent can no doubt be tremendous.

I do like kids, though, and do get along very well with them, but it's always great when at the end of the day, they go back to their rightful parents ;o). Suits me just fine.

It is therefore good for me that Martin is not ready to be a parent yet either. It's important that both partners agree on something like that, because it IS a big deal. The "pressure" can be hard sometimes, especially since I know at least 12 friends/acquaintances/colleagues/Yellow Goddess who have already given birth this year, or are due to give birth this year. That's a LOT. And there's still the possibility of hearing about more pregnancies! But as long as husband and wife are agreeing, then it makes it easier to stand your ground.

So no....we're not going to add to that number this year (hopefully not the next few years either)... . Abstinence is a good way of birth control indeed... . Hey! Just kidding ;o). I'm not so bad to Martin, okay?

Anyway, when it comes to having our own kid, the only thing I am curious about right now is how our kid will look like... . I mean, ½ Danish + 1/4 Chinese + 1/4 Indian is not a very usual mix, right? I'll be first in line if they ever have a "check-out-how-your-kid-will-look-like" machine somewhere ;o). Any one of you know of the existance of such a machine???

Just random ramblings & good friends...

To my dear friends who took the time to write in my guestbook - thank you, thank you, thank you!!! You guys are the best :o). To other readers, regular or otherwise, who do not sign my guestbook or leave comments, you guys are wonderful too and I respect your choice to remain anonymous. Just make sure to keep coming back, okay ;o)?

It's not always easy to think about a topic to write about, since some of my days are just boring. I mean, I get up, go to work, come home, eat, sleep, get up again, go to work, maybe squeeze in an hour of tennis, come home, eat, sleep...so yeah, I'd rather not blog about daily routines as I'm sure you'd rather not read about them. I might end up boring myself to death before I get the chance to click on "publish post".

Maybe I should purposely pick a fight with Martin so that I can blog about it...*hee* *hee*. Well, I did "warn" him to be good to me from now on otherwise I'll blog it to the whole world. So far it's working ;o). Ladies, are you taking notes?

Anyway, speaking of blogging, it turned out that one of my very good friends in Singapore whom I have known since primary school had started blogging around the same time as me too! It's quite scary, actually. In secondary school, Cindy and I used to write crazy/funny letters to each other occasionally (back in the days when emails didn't quite exist yet). Now, we had somehow started our blogs at the same time. Of all the years, of all the months, of all the dates, it had to be end of May 2007. That's scary. I'll be sure to add her blog link here when she's ready to open it up to the world, although it will appeal mainly to the female audience since it is centred on her newborn baby Caitlyn :o).

Now that I've mentioned very good friends from primary school, I have another one named Shirley. Well, I knew her since primary school, but we only became close friends since the start of secondary school (same as with Cindy). Shirley and I hanged out quite a lot, and at some point, it became very normal for our classmates to mix up both our names. Instead of calling me "Sheila", they call me "Shirley", and vice-versa.

Now, the scary thing about this is that up till today, there are sometimes still people who mistakenly call me "Shirley" here in Denmark! I'm talking about people who do not know the real Shirley, nor do they know that I have a friend by that name. I mean, it's really scary especially when the name "Shirley" is not at all a name used in Denmark! Yes, it is an internationally known name, but just not common at all in this part of the world, so how on earth do they connect "Sheila" with "Shirley"?!? I don't mind it though, because it never fails to amaze me when it happens, and it just brings back good memories... .

They say that over time, husbands and wives become more and more like each other. However, it seems that there is also a special kind of connection between good friends of many many years :o).

"Straight from the mouth"

Sheila: We should have a car if we have kids.
Martin: No, we should see how the gas prices are first before deciding to buy a car.
Sheila: Hmm...in that case, we'll make our decision to have kids based on the gas prices then.

So far, yet so small

Copenhagen is a city which is not easy to expand. It started out as a small fishing village back in the mid 15th century, and now it is the capital of Denmark. The Copenhagen muncipality itself, which is divided into 15 different districts, has a population of around 500,000 who are sharing 88km² of land space.

Even though city life in Copenhagen is nothing compared to the hustle and bustle of the city life in Singapore, I am contented living here in the Copenhagen muncipality. Yes, I do miss the late opening hours of the shops (they close at 5pm or 6pm here on weekdays, 2pm on Saturdays, and are not open at all on Sundays) and I do miss the inexpensive local and international cuisine, but at least I am still surrounded by people and not cows, sheep, horses or pigs.

Also, it is easy for me to go to work, hang out with friends, play tennis, or to go to various parties without thinking so much of when the last train or bus is going to leave. Depending on how far away from the city you live, some places have the buses running just once an hour after eg. 9pm!

Cars are super expensive to own in Denmark, and petrol prices are sky high too. Since Martin and I live just 10-15mins by bus from the city centre, and we both have the same direct bus to and from work in the city area, it is not necessary for us to own a car. If we ever own a car, it will be either for practical reasons, like if we ever have kids, or for pure, unadulterated luxury reasons, like having too much money to spend ;o).

There are a lot of very old yet very expensive apartments in Copenhagen. There are also not enough apartment units to go around (with a government rule which does not allow buildings to have more than 5 or 6 stories in most areas in the city, it's no wonder there is a shortage).

Housing here is therefore a big problem indeed, and more people are either finding it difficult to find accommodation in the city, or are not willing to pay such a high price for such small space. It is not surprising also to find apartments with no bathrooms (built in the period where people didn't often take showers)! If you are fortunate to find an apartment with a bathroom, they are usually so small that it would make it difficult for even slim couples like Martin and me to shower together (yes, yes, we do that a lot. It's called "couple bonding").

Judging from this, I can say that Martin and I are very blessed to have found our apartment. It is close to the city centre, yet not in it. It was within the price range which we were willing to pay for at the time we were looking for a place back in 2004 (expensive then, but considered very cheap now due to the high property price hike). It was built in 1991, so it's not more than a quarter of a century old (yet). We have a big kitchen and a big bathroom (compared to the average apartment in Copenhagen). We have peace and quiet from traffic. And though the size is written as 68m² on paper, the space is used in the most efficient way that it feels bigger than 68m². And as a bonus, we have an empty attic above us which can be transformed into an extra room if we ever need it (or want it) in the future. A potential penthouse :o)!

If we should EVER decide to move out of the city and into the middle of no man's land, then it should only be to a house which is at least double the size of our city apartment. Anything less than 100m² would be immediately struck off the list, especially if it is a house with double storeys because that would make the house very small and packed up.

Size matters a lot to Yellow Goddess. Whether it is the size of her diamond ring or the size of her home, she will be happy as long as they are bigger than those of people she knows. In fact, it is an extra bonus if they are bigger than Sheila's! Hmm...no wonder she was upset when I didn't congratulate her / acknowledge that her tummy was getting bigger than mine... ;o). Good thing Bil and Martin are twins, otherwise she'll be trying to compare whose husband's gun (piss-tool) is bigger!

Since she is playing this size competition by herself, it is important for her that I do not see just how small their new home is because that would make her lose face to me. After all, she did comment to a friend that our apartment was very small (even though she and Bil had been living in 50m² of space for around 5 years before they moved to a bigger apartment in 2004, and now to a smaller terrace house of 88m²), so it will not do for me to see her downgraded dwellings and know that she has "lost".

This is what I mean:

Perhaps it will be easier to visualise with furniture?

Notice how we get an extra room already just by putting our kitchen in our living room. I don't like "open kitchens", though. The cooking just stinks up the whole living room and makes it smoky, dirty and oily. And hey, our bathroom is at least big enough to have a bathtub in future (we just have a shower at the moment).

But yeah...from the looks of it, the 20m² which they have more than us is probably just for the bigger terrace, the staircase area and the staircase landing on the upper floor. A waste in m² for the stairs area if you ask me... . The only plus I can see is the bigger terrace, but then again, since it is a terrace house, it means no privacy from the neighbours who can easily peek in... . Besides, with Denmark having cold weather 75% of the year, one cannot really enjoy being outside very much.

When the time comes for us to convert our empty attic into another room, I won't be surprised if Yellow Goddess and Bil start looking for bigger place to live in, simply because she has to have better. The question is though, why didn't they just look for a big house from the very beginning when they moved so far away? The brand new ones would of course be too unaffordable for them, but does it have to be brand new then (their current place was completed last year)?

Indeed....so far away, yet for so small a place:

Click to see bigger image

Red dots indicate where we live (they in Roskilde, we in København).To put the distance in relation to something, we can say that if you were to drive from the east side of Singapore to the west side, you will find yourself falling off the island of Singapore and into the water... .

I wonder if heaven has Internet connections... . Yellow Goddess will not be too pleased with me if she goes online and chance upon my blog... .

Home Alone

I miss my honey bunny :o(. He's in London today to attend some kind of training course and won't be back into my arms until very late tomorrow night.

It is not very often that we spend nights away from each other, so it'll feel quite strange to have the big bed all to myself tonight. No one to cuddle with, no one to kiss goodnight, no one to touch and know that you're not alone, no one to entangle toes with, no one to spoon with (we always say that he's "tablespoon" and I'm "teaspoon" whenever we spoon each other)...*sigh*.

Hmm...but then again, there'll be no one to fight over the duvet with, and no biochemical warfare against each other (oh come on! I'm sure we're not the only couple who fart on each other in bed....are we?). In some positive way, there will at least be some hours of peace :o). No, actually, I would give anything to start the bedroom war again... .

Thank goodness that it is only 1 night of silence... .

Patriotism

Well...Denmark's not my country, but here's proof that I was supporting the Danish national football team last night:

Danish flag

(same colours as the Singapore flag - woohoo!)

Nice? I did it myself ;o). It's very easy to do, but the part which took the most time was waiting for it to dry... . Martin had to practiacally dress me up as if I was a helpless kid since I couldn't use my fingers to zip up or button up otherwise it would destroy my precious work of fingernail art!

Female Football Fan

I was watching the Euro2008 Championship qualifying match between Denmark and Sweden earlier today live at the stadium (Parken). Man, what a controversial match! It didn't start good since Denmark was down 0-3 already in the first half, but just a few minutes before half-time, they managed to narrow the margin by scoring 1 goal.

The first 10 minutes of the 2nd half was pretty boring. I almost fell asleep, and judging from the silence in the Danish camp, I think the other tens of thousands of Danish supporters were falling asleep too. However, the game finally picked up momentum when Jon Dahl Tomasson scored the 2nd goal for Denmark! Yay!!! Everyone was awake again, with cheering and clapping and beating of drums as hope began to rise to an all new high.

To everyone's delight, Denmark scored goal #3 within the next few minutes! I'll be damned! The atmosphere at the stadium reached fever pitch, and I'm sure even the Swedes were impressed. 12 minutes to go, and the Danes were still fighting. A draw would have been good, but at this point, every Dane was stretching out to touch victory.

89 minutes...and NOOOO!!!! Penalty kick awarded to Sweden for an illegal tackle in the box! Red card to Poulsen too! As if that wasn't bad enough, a Danish spectator had to run onto the field to punch the referee in the face! What the...?!?

Needless to say, the match was stopped immediately. Players and officials departed into the dressing room to discuss what the outcome of the match should be, and while they discussed, 2 more spectators came onto the field to make a spectacle of themselves. Great.

Finally, a decision was reached. The match was ended, with Denmark losing 0-3 to Sweden. Thank you very much, Mr Referee Puncher - you just cost us our chance to qualify for Euro2008. May you NEVER be allowed to watch another live match at the stadiums in your life!

Anyway, I usually only watch World Cup finals and European Cup finals (but never live at the stadiums), and can't really be bothered with club football or qualifying matches. However, I was at today's qualifying match at the stadium simply because it was an invitation from one of our major suppliers ;o). It was a good experience indeed.

Here is the strange thing about my relationship with Martin: I get super crazy about football every 2 years for 1 month, while Martin doesn't care a single bit about it. Normally, it's the guy who's crazy about football while his woman rolls her eyes. In our case, while I watch the games, he gets me my beer. No, just kidding; I hate beer. But yeah, he doesn't understand why I get crazy over football during the finals, while I wish he would be just a bit enthusiastic about it so that I can have a co-spectator at home.

Then again, come to think of it, maybe it's good that he doesn't care. In that way, at least someone will be taking care of dinner while the other watches the match ;o).

Anyway....my favourite team is Portugal, so I hope they win Euro2008 this time. They were so close during Euro2004, and did well in World Cup 2006, so it's should be about time that they actually pull themselves together to win something! I just hope they quit the play-acting on the field though. Wimps.