Sunny Home

A video clip of our apartment in Sunny Beach. We're still missing the sofabed, a dressing table, some carpets/rugs, curtains, TV cabinet + TV, and some pictures on the wall. We already ordered the sofabed and dressing table, but they take about 45 days to be delivered since there was no more stock of the ones we wanted. The rest of the things, we'll probably order them from the property rental management company we plan to use.

From summer to autumn

We arrived back from Sunny Beach, Bulgaria this afternoon after a week of wonderful summer weather! A real sun, sand, sea, and shopping vacation. Much needed, especially the sun; Sunny Beach lived up to its name on that one. The Black Sea though, was freakin' COLD!!! Felt like ice water to me, so I didn't swim in it at all. Didn't even use it for emergencies.....if you know what I mean (as in "when you got to go, you got to go" type of emergencies).

The first few days were spent shopping for furniture for our holiday apartment, though. The kitchen was made in time before our arrival, as well as the double bed and wardrobe. That was pretty much it. Not having tables and chairs for the first 3 days made us realise how much we took these for granted. The night we chose to eat at home became a challenge, so we had to do it Japanese/Korean-style by sitting on the floor and using our big suitcase as the "table".

We did manage to hit the beach a few times (2 mornings of sunbathing), and we did do some sightseeing too during the last couple of days. I guess I'll let the pictures do the talking now.

Circled parts are where we were.

Our Apartment in Sunny Beach

Circled unit is ours

Newly made kitchen

Newly made bed

Bathroom

Balcony

Swimming pool (unfortunately, not ready for use yet)

10mins walk from the beach

Comfortable looking bar

Old Russian Lada

Dinner at Djanny's - big portions at cheap prices

Sunny Beach coast by night

Mother-in-law and I

Couple shadow of Martin and I

Picture of the shadow's substance

Playing mini-golf. I won, even though I was 23 shots over par ;o).

No vacation would be complete without a visit to the Chinese restaurant!

Sunbathing...even though I didn't really need it.

Bulgarian dance performance, "Dance of the Wind". Kinda like "Riverdance" on a smaller scale.

Nessebar

An old town area - on the UNESCO list of World Heritage Sites since 1983.

I can imagine a lot of wedding photo shoots in this old town. So charming!

More ruins caused by war.

This could almost be a picture taken in Thailand... .

Bourgas

Walking / shopping street

At the beach in Bourgas which is close the the harbour, so the water isn't that clean here.

An observation we made in Sunny Beach was that there weren't really Asians around (apart from the restaurant owners). I seemed to be the only Asian walking the streets. It was the same thing when we were in Riga, Latvia, last year. Come on, fellow Asians! We must not slack in our Asian Invasion!!! ;o)

Anyway, now we're back in cold, autumn-ish Denmark. Vacation's over, and the reality of work will hit me when my alarm rings at 08:45hrs tomorrow morning... . Funny enough, I had been waking up at around 08:30hrs Danish time in Bulgaria for 1 week without any complaints/difficulties. Had to even get up at 04:00hrs in the morning to catch our flight there last Sunday! I guess it's a different feeling when getting up to have fun instead of getting up to go to work... .

Oh, and btw, travelling with my mother-in-law (Mil) wasn't a nightmare at all :o). She and Martin's stepdad would like to join us on our next trip to Singapore, so if it had been a nightmare to travel with Mil on this trip, I would most likely book them a ticket to Siberia or something instead of Singapore for our next trip (hey, both start with "S", right?). But no, everything went a-ok on this trip, so no need for drastic measures on our next trip(s) together ;o).

Soon to Sunny Beach, Bulgaria!!!

Our 1st vacation since April is soon approaching! I have been 100% in Denmark since returning home from Singapore in Easter that I look forward to being away for 1 week in a different country, different climate (warmer, hopefully), different routine, different everything.

My mother-in-law will be joining Martin and me on this trip. It'll be the 1st time I travel with her, so I look forward indeed to some "female-bonding". I've heard nightmarish stories from friends who had travelled together with their parents-in-law before, but I'm sure my story will be a breath of fresh air :o).

Anyway, there are a lot of things to get done before the actual trip itself. Our holiday apartment there is still rather empty, but the kitchen and bedroom should hopefully be done by the time we arrive there. We'll then have to find all the extra things we can bring there which we have too many of here (eg. cups, glasses, towels, bedsheets, etc, etc), and then buy the rest there. Since we plan to rent this apartment out during the summer season next year, we need all this in place during the time we're there. Therefore, even though it will be a vacation, it will also be a kind of personal "work" trip.

I'm glad I don't need to apply for a VISA to go to Bulgaria anymore. I needed to do that last year when I went there (alone), but since Bulgaria has joined the EU (European Union) at the beginning of 2007, the VISA requirement for Singapore passport holders has been removed. Thank goodness for the EU!

I don't hope the prices there become "EU standard", though. Last year, during their pre-EU time, one can still get alcohol for almost nothing:

1 Lv = 1 SGD = 3.80 DKK

Almost unreal, huh? I should go find that place again and see if the prices have gone up, and if so, by how much.

So yeah, if any of you plan to go to Sunny Beach, Bulgaria someday, just let me know :o). Direct flights out from Copenhagen costs around 1,500 DKK - 2,000 DKK (return, tax included) and it takes only 3hrs to get there. The airport (in Burgas) is a mere ½hr drive away from Sunny Beach.

In the meantime, I am counting down the days till I get out of the cold, wet, autumn season of Denmark. My goal is to come home with a nice tan ;o). Hmm...not that I really need one, but just to "stock up" a bit for the winter season ;o).

"Not interested."

Usually, when I see a number on my mobile phone which does not belong to any of my contacts, I tend to do 2 things: ignore it the first time, or do a search on it in the online yellow pages while the phone's still ringing to see who it is before I answer it.

The first action of ignoring it the first time is done when I do not have immediate online access to check that number before answering. I tell myself that if it's important, then that mystery person will call back. If that mystery person does not call back right away, then I might get the chance to get online later on to see who he/she was so that the next call I get from him/her could then be answered. If however, he/she calls back within a few minutes (indicating importance....or maybe just persistence), then I might oblige and answer it even before finding out first who he/she is.

The second action of doing a quick search in the online phone directory while the phone is still ringing requires 2 things. 1) that I have immediate access to a fast working Internet connection and 2) that the person calling me is patient enough to let the phone ring long enough for me to do my search and decide whether to give the green light or not. My voicemail is disabled anyway, so that my phone can ring and ring for a long time before it gets answered.

Speaking of voicemails, do people actually still use that feature??? I personally don't like leaving voice messages (I feel silly talking in a monologue) so I either hang up and try again later (or right away, if it's really urgent), or I simply just send an sms to the person (if possible).

I personally don't like receiving voice messages either. For 1 thing, it costs me to dial up my message center to hear the message. For another thing, the longer the message is, the more expensive for me, and since the caller is already feeding the phone company by the minute to leave me that message, why do I have to feed the phone company too for that very same message??? Better for both of us then if you just hang up and try again later, or send me an sms if what you want to say can be summarised. For yet another thing, have you ever listened to voice messages whereby what you hear is 1 of the following:

Caller 1: "mumble, mumble, mumble.....mumble, mumble, mumble."

This leaves me in a dilemma - do I ignore the message and risk the caller getting angry at me for not responding to the message, or do I waste more money to listen to that message over and over again in order to decipher it?

Caller 2: "grumble, grumble....it's her answering machine." (Click! Hangs up, no useful message).

Right, so I just paid by the minute to hear you tell me what I already know?

Caller 3: "Hi Sheila! This is...(WIND BLOWING IN BACKGROUND)....just wanted to tell you...(TRAFFIC NOISE AND CARS HORNING)....goodbye!"

Ok....this one leaves me in the same dilemma as Caller 1.

Caller 5: "Hi Sheila! This is John Smith. You can call be back at 52 40 71 63. Bye!"

For this type of message, I usually end up calling my message center a couple more times first before I call John, just to hear again that number he left for me to call him back with. I mean, I don't know about you guys, but I don't listen to my voicemails with pen and paper in my hand as if I were in the lecture hall taking down notes on how to maintain sustainable tourism.

Caller 5: "...................................." (Click! Hangs up, no message)

Yeah, the silent, heavy breather. I don't know, maybe he's waiting for the beep but somehow missed it, or maybe he's got voicemail phobia, or maybe he's deep in thoughts thinking about why he's calling me in the first place, and then decided it wasn't important after all, or maybe he's just a miserable stalker. Whatever the reason, WHY SHOULD I WASTE MY MONEY ON LISTENING TO HIM BREATHE?!?!? And I'll usually listen till the every end of that message just in case he decides to change his mind and leave me a message after all.

So yeah, I fired my voicemail secretary a long time ago, and my phone has since been allowed to ring and ring long enough for me to actually dig into my bag, find it, and answer it without that annoying secretary cutting in to answer my calls for me after just a few seconds.

I did have fun for a while with my previous personal voicemail greeting, though. It went something like this: "Hi! This is Sheila. (silence....waiting for caller to respond) Hey! How are you??? (short silence) By the way, I can't talk right now, so please leave a message after the beep!"

Now the messages I get to listen to afterwards, THOSE were the ones worth paying money for ;o)! To hear people laughing and realising that they had been talking to themselves all along, thinking that they had managed to get a hold of me ;o). Throws them off guard each time...and some people kept getting tricked over and over again. After a while though, people do learn - then it's not funny for me anymore ;o).

Anyway, back to the original topic, which is "why I like to know who's calling before I answer my phone", in case you didn't get it earlier. I got a call earlier today, and it was showing "Withheld" on my mobile, therefore no number I could do a search on. Sometimes if someone calls me using Skype, it will show "Withheld", so since I was expecting an overseas call, I decided to answer this 1.

Who do I get? A personal friend:

Telmarketer: "Hi, this is Søren calling from BT newspaper (Danish tabloid newspaper). Would you like to hear about a good offer we have for you?"

Sheila: "No, thanks - I'm not interested."

Telemarketer: "Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. May I ask why you'd not be interested?"

Sheila: "Well, I read the free newspapers, and it's also free online."

Telemarketer: "Yes, that's true. But the offer we can give costs almost nothing, plus you can get special offers on travels, restaurants, blah, blah, blah."

Sheila: "Yeah....but no, thanks - I'm not interested."

Telemarketer: "Ok, I understand. I'm sorry to hear that, though. Well, have a good day!"

I should have just told him I was illiterate. Or better still, that I'm blind, so if BT newspaper comes with a Braille system, then maybe we can have a more fruitful conversation.

So yeah...I like screening my calls. Not only do I like to know who's calling me (if you're not a contact already in my phonebook), but I'd also like to be prepared. If it's my dentist calling, then I'll know ok...something with my appointment. If it's my optician, then I'll know it's time to pick something up from there. If it's my bank, then something with my money. If it's my friend using her home number or work number not listed in my contacts, then ok...at least it's someone I already know.

The caller already has the advantage of knowing who the "callee" is. As a "callee", I'd just like to be at the same advantage too, of knowing who the caller is.

The end of her side of the story

It seems that me helping Yellow Goddess to translate her Mandarin posts has hit home, because she has decided to remove them from her blog. I would probably do so too, if these posts were filled with lies and accusations which suddenly the whole world can read and understand. Maybe not necessarily the whole world, but just a handful of people such as Bil and mother-in-law would be enough.

For example, on her very 1st (and very long) post dedicated to me dated 23 July, she started out by saying (blue = original text, green = translation):

"23 July

博客风波

前两日听婆婆说,有个博客,充满一些疯疯颠颠的贴子.我好奇地问,那一些疯疯颠颠的贴子,写些什么.婆婆说,写你和我儿子,还有我孙子. 好奇的我,决定上去看看."

"Blog crisis

"Two days ago, my mother-in-law said that there is a blog, full of wild and crazy posts. I curiously asked, what kind of crazy posts, and what about? Mother-in-law said, they are about you and my son, and my grandson. Very curious me decided to go and check it out."

Already in the 1st paragraph, there are a couple of lies.

First lie: She knew about my blog already on 5th July, not 21st July as claimed. She did start up her blog on (or around) 5th July, as I had written in my post on that date, but made it sound as if she had only "discovered" my blog on 21st July? Is that to show that she did not start hers as a reaction to mine? That she had been happily blogging for almost a month when "suddenly", on 21st July, she "heard" about mine?

Second lie: She wrote that it was our mother-in-law who told her about my blog. The truth would more likely be the other way around - that she/Bil told my mother-in-law about it. You see, a few days after my birthday on 08 Aug, Martin's stepdad came by to our home to say "hi" and to give me some birthday presents. I'm sure he would have heard about this "blog, full of wild and crazy posts" by then (if what Yellow Goddess wrote is true), but was there any mention of it when he came by? Nada. Not to me, not to Martin....nada. It was only some days later that they heard about it for the first time.



"原来是前两日老公帖的儿子的照片, 招徕网上跳梁小丑的无端攻击. 不因为其他，只因为这博客的主人,嫉妒之火又烧起来了，我们就被她认定为没有资格当父母。"

"Apparently, it’s a photo which hubby took of our son 2 days ago, provokingly uploaded on the Internet by a comedian clown as an attack for no reason. Not because of any other reason than that this blog master’s envious fire burns up again, so she saw us as unqualified parents."

I don't really know which photo Bil took "2 days ago" (i.e. 21st July) that she was refering to. This one? But that was taken way before 21st July. Perhaps this one? But that was taken also way before 21st July. The last picture I have of nephew is this one, taken on 20th July. Finally, picture taken on a date that almost fits her post, but there's a major problem: Bil didn't take it, Martin did, so it can't be that picture either.

As for me seeing them as "unqualified parents", and "attacking + libelling their parental love towards their child" (我们做父母的对孩子的爱遭到攻击和诽谤), in what way? In my "Chuby nephy" post, I was writing "in general", not "in specifics". In my "Pretty in purple" post, I just thought it funny that Bil used the adjective "pretty" for his son, and I explained why with illustrations. How does an "attack" on the used word "pretty" become an "attack" on "their parental love towards their child"?



"包括我刚刚生产后和大家聚会,所有人都上前恭贺我们,看看我们的儿子. 只有她,闷在角落里,一声不响."

"when the whole family met up after I just gave birth, everyone came forward to congratulate us and came to see our son. Except her, melancholy at the corner, not making a single sound."

Hmm...funny how I remember quite clearly Bil giving me their baby son to carry in my arms, me looking down at him, and smilingly saying "Hi, Mxxxxx!" I suppose the reason why I remember this and she doesn't is because it happened while she wasn't there to see it. Should I be worshipping him in front of her before it will be accepted as a sign of interest?



"那次聚会之后, 她仍然利用其老公传话, 继续要求要来我门新居拜访. 我和老公被问烦了, 于是说: 她既不和我老公说话, 又不愿意答理我, 更对孩子不感兴趣, 为什么老是要求要来我家. 为什么不自己直接打电话, 直接问, 顺便表示友好?"

"After that family gathering, she still used her husband to convey the message of her continued request to come to our new home to visit. I and hubby became bothered by it already, therefore said: she already doesn’t talk to my hubby, and is not willing to acknowledge me, and furthermore doesn’t show the child any interest, then why is she always asking to come to our home. Why doesn’t she directly make a call herself, to straightforwardly ask, while conveniently expressing it in a friendly way?"

This is quite a paradox for me, isn't it? When I show some interest in wanting to pay them a visit in their brand new home after they moved in there more than ½ a year ago, they viewed it suspiciously. If I don't show any interest in them at all, then I am viewed as someone who can't be bothered about them, or someone who just seethingly envies them. Damned if I do, damned if I don't. Besides, whenever they came to visit us (which had been quite a few times already), Bil was always the 1 who arranged it with Martin. Seems logical, since they're the ones who speak the most to each other.

Do we ask "Why do you guys want to come visit us?" No. We don't use the "Why" word, we use instead the "Welcome" word. Was that really so difficult for them to use back on us? So yes, the demand which Yellow Goddess made of wanting me to call her directly to ask for "permission" to visit them was indeed outrageous to my ears. A simple "Welcome to our new home!" was all that was needed. No need for suspicions, no need for lame excuses of being tired each time since they had had several other visitors who visited them during that time, shortly after the days they had cancelled on us. It also wasn't like we were planning on staying for 10 hours, or even for dinner.



"譬如 此人不知从哪里侦察到我们新居的平面图"

"For example I don’t know where these people know how to search for the floor plan of our new home"

Since she was wondering, the floor plan of their new home was sent to Martin by Bil himself, just after they had decided which unit to purchase. No need for any big search from my side at all, since Martin had forwarded the pdf file to me to take a look too, and it had been in my documents for more than a year already.



"再譬如, 此人犹如狗仔队员, 偷照不少我们的照片, 将我们的头减掉,"

"Again for example, this person is just like a paparazzi, secretly took many of our pictures, cropped off our heads,"

Funny how she assumed that I took those pictures like the paparazzi, when the real person who took those pictures was Martin. And very openly, I might add; not in secret.



"原来她对一些陈芝麻烂谷子的旧事仍然一直耿耿于怀, 虽然表面上她已正正式式, 冠冕堂皇的向我道了歉, 居然又在她的博客中提了出来. 还扬言要寻找我老公89年前的情人,以达到气死我的目的. 其实我哪有那么小心眼, 她或她老公要真的成为我老公前情人的好朋友, 当然共同聚会时我欢迎了."

"Apparently, she still continuously took to heart some “sesame seed, rotten millet” (ie small matters) past event, even though on the surface she already formally and pompously apologised to me, yet unexpectedly it got mentioned again on her blog.

She also threatened to seek my husband’s sweetheart from the year ’89, in order to try and irritate me; actually I’m not so narrow-minded, if she or her husband really want to be good friends with my husband’s ex’s good friends, I will certainly welcome a get-together."

That "small, rotten" past event she was refering to was probably this one. Yes, I had apologised to her for gloatting about it after hearing that she was rejected (though she never accepted my apology), but does my apology mean that I should never ever tell anyone about it ever again? My apology to her was for gloatting about it directly to her. My post however, was about how I'm still puzzled about the whole thing, how I don't understand why she even wanted to try, my feelings about working with family members, and yes, a good example of a lame excuse she can childishly come up with.

As for Bil's sweetheart from the year '96-'98 (not '89 as Yellow Goddess had written, but I guess she made a typo there since Martin and Bil were not even interested in the female species at age 14), I doubt she'll really welcome a get-together. As far as I remember, she got quite upset when Martin found some old photos of the ex at his parents' home and showed them to Bil, who was there too. "I'm going to find some photos of your ex too and show them to Sheila!" she told Martin. So, if showing Bil old photos of his ex could upset her, then I can't imagine how she would welcome a get-together in person.



"她这种人讲话超难听，虽然她这种人没恶意，甚至是好意，但每件事经由她的金口一开，莫名其妙就矗立了一堆敌人，真有一套，真令人称奇！世人皆无如她一般轰走别人的超能力！"

"She this kind of person when she speaks it’s super horrible to hear, even if she this kind of person does not have malice, even with good intentions, still every matter which comes out via her golden mouth, strangely seems to create a bunch of enemies, really some case, really causes one to express admiration! Nobody has the talent like her, the talent of chasing people away!"

Right...this is quite interesting. If I may share 2 particular times when she opened her mouth, this was what came out:

Year 2004 - Sheila's mobile rang, and she saw it was Yellow Goddess calling her after 6 months of silence:
Sheila (puzzledly): Hello?
Yellow Goddess: Sheila, you're a piece of sh*t, you're a piece of sh*t! Martin is also a piece of sh*t, and you both deserve each other! (click! She hung up the phone)
Sheila (to herself): What the...??? (goes off to tell Martin what just happened)

Year 2005 - in the presence of mother-in-law, grandma, cousin and cousin's (ex)boyfriend:
Yellow Goddess (to Sheila): Bit*h!
Sheila: Thank you.
Yellow Goddess: Yeah, bit*h!

She really speaks like a mature, refined and educated young lady, doesn't she? The above 2 examples may sound too far out to be true, but I had experienced them 1st hand to know their reality.



Anyway, the original post in its unedited fullness here:
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3

English translation here (after getting proof-read by a friend):
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5

This post will end the "air-time" she has on my blog to tell her side of the story.

More sides of her story

Yellow Goddess' Mandarin post dedicated to me dated 10 SEPT here.

Translation:

Prophecy

(Blog Crisis afterword:)
My intuition and prophecies are a lot of times very accurate.

I already told mother-in-law a long time ago, we all underestimate people. Definitely no need to try and understand, why that insane old woman would not meet with reason. Why does this earth have murderers, why does this earth have parents of what seems like a normal yet violating child. What is impossible in the infinite universe? I treat that insane person's blog without much opinion, thinking about it, isn't she just thinking about letting herself and a group of vulgar people wage war? It looks like she scolds online on her blog a lot, I am not surprised. Had also advised hubby already, let's watch that insane woman grow and extinguish.

Mother-in-law wrote to that insane person, explicitly telling her that our whole family abhors the way she is doing things. She childishly replied unexpectely saying, that I am the one who had stirred up all the matters, and use her silly and narrow heart to make her defense. We all gave her the chance to get out of an embarrassing situation already, but she's still stupid. Seems like that insane old woman probably didn't have good upbringing, not only doesn't know any manners, but also talks back. Disregards her beloved precious rabbit's feelings. (However, her precious rabbit also has no backbone, even though that insane woman tramples on his blood brother and wife, and even his nephew, all he can do is hum, having no responsibility in this. Doesn't even listen to his own mother's words. If he's together with such a woman, there will definitely not be any good results).

Her precious rabbit has no means to prevent her fervour scoldings online, he just said, "Good, then while she blogs, I'll have time to play my computer. Seems like these 2 people's relationship is not excellent, soon going to reach the end already, don't know if it's because her precious rabbit's Thai lover and him still have obtained their online relations again? Doesn't he commonly use the words: "hvad hun ikke ved, har hun ikke ondt af!" Translated in Mandarin: "What she doesn't know won't hurt her. Conveys that the man oversteps his psychologically lucky period." It's really that insane person's retribution.

That insane person also very naturally got her husband to call me, got her husband to have a talk with me (ed. regarding the affair he's been accused of), what's there to talk about? Such a man without backbone, now feels that the muddy matter which his wife started is now unamusing. Could it be that I had carelessly made a casual guess, which really hit the mark of the dead hole, that I really also assumed and assumed the truth? (Such anxiety, don't tell me it's true?). That time when that insane woman trampled on his blood brother and wife, and own related nephew, why was he like a withdrawn turtle that didn't raise his head? Let these brothers' common friends look and think about giving him a few loud and clear earful reminders to help him sober up. His conscience and dear emotions have been eaten by the dogs already.

Mother-in-law is a good person, who also supports me with the same viewpoint: if man can reduce one problem it is always better than creating more problems instead. She also especially instructed my husband, to please don't find the legal way to deal with her. However, that crazy person recently still happily not aware. *Sigh*, she's really still mentally sick, so deeply sick! Why is she so interested in our life in this way. Doesn't she have her own life? However, it seems that her abnormal envy and our great achievemnets are directly related.

2 sides to every story - her story

WARNING!!! Very long post!!!

There are always 2 sides to every story. So far, you have all been hearing only my side of the story, which I grant you, would of course seem rather biased. I had written previously that even though Yellow Goddess would make me the star of her blog, I would not have "any interest or intention of reading what comes out of her head". That is still true - I'm not interested at all about her thoughts about me since I don't value her shallow, illogical opinions at all. I know myself well enough not to let her words pull me down.

So why this post then, you ask. Well, 4 days ago, 1 of my readers (whose name he doesn't want revealed) told me that he had just read Yellow Goddess' blog, and it was full of untrue and hateful things about me. I told him that I already know there will be such things about me without even needing to go there, but I really don't care what she has to write about me. This friend strongly feels though, that I should defend myself, and suggested that I translate her Mandarin posts about me into English and show you guys her heart.

After that conversation, I thought well...why not? I can practice reading Mandarin again (has been such a long time ago since I read enough Mandarin anyway), plus, I can present to my readers her story - unedited. Would that not be fair? To hear both sides? Besides, I'll be doing her a favour by translating the text which she doesn't want non-Mandarin speakers (aka the rest of the world outside of China) to read, no? So yes, she'll get some "air time" on my blog :o).

Well, let's start with the shortest one. Trust me, the first 1 she made just for me was extremely long that it will take days for me to translate (with the help of friends who will proof-read it to be sure it's accurate enough) for you guys, and she made another nice one for me yesterday which I will translate too. So yeah, let's start small first - an extract from the post she made on her 7 years wedding anniversary. How extremely sweet of her to think about me on her happy day :o). I feel so loved... .

"13AUG

7年了,真快呀.不知不觉中也是他的老婆7年了,还完成了生子大业.哈哈.我挺得意的.也应该得意一下的.我还不到30岁耶!蛮有成就感的.

嫉妒我们幸福一家的,乱砸blog文字的那个疯老女人,气得吐血,有种自己生一个呀.估计是做的孽太多了,想生生不出来, 哈哈,活该!! 她这种鸡肋,以他老公的花心,等他一找到更好的,加上她自己那无德无能又无貌,当弃妇的日子应该不远了.言论自由,不是吗,那我也有呀,看看,
她搬石头砸了自己的脚吧.

还是一句老话，己所不欲，勿施于人。"

"7 years already, it’s really fast. Without even realising I've been his wife for 7 years already, and even accomplished the goal of giving birth to a boy, a great undertaking. Ha ha. I’m rather proud of myself. And should be proud of myself. I’m not even 30 yet! I really have a great sense of achievement.

That family member who envies our happiness, that mad old woman who randomly pounds on her blog writing, angers me till I vomit blood. If she has guts then just give birth to one. I
reckon it’s because she has too many sins, so even when she wants to give birth she just can’t, ha ha, serves her right!! She, this kind of chicken rib, as accordingly to her husband’s
flirtateous nature, just wait till he finds an even better one, plus her own lack of goodness, capabilities and appearance, her days as a discarded woman should not be far already. Freedom
of speech, isn’t it, that I have too, wait and see, the stones she moves will smash her own feet.

And as the proverb goes, do not do to others what you do not want done to you."

***********************

Ok, ok…you non-Mandarin readers might be thinking "How can those few Chinese characters result in so many English words?!" Hee…hee…yes, it can. Chinese grammer is really one of the simplest of all the languages, so if I should translate directly word for word, the English version would hardly make much readable sense because vital connecting words, prepositions, etc would be missing… . Plus the fact that we use several alphabets in English just for 1 word, whereas a Chinese character takes up less space. Anyway, I have Mandarin-readers on my blog too, so they can easily verify if the English translation is correct or not.

Let's analyse this blog post of hers a bit, shall we? I'll like to talk about me being envious of her/their happiness. Now, I ask myself, what accomplishments of hers/theirs am I envious about? Try as I might, I can't seem to think of even 1. The below "items" popped into my head, but they had to be struck off the list almost as immediately as they got on it.

So, starting from material items to human:

Material
1. Their home
For one, I don't envy people who live in the middle of freakin' nowhere, especially when they're not even living in castles or mansions. I like my home right here in Copenhagen, and I wouldn't ever give it up for a place like theirs.

2. Her job
Not only does Yellow Goddess live in the middle of freakin' nowhere, she also works in the middle of freakin' nowhere! Should I be envious of that? I don't think so. I prefer to work in trendy Copenhagen with real people instead of manure-stenched areas with cows. In fact, if my memory serves me correctly, she was the one who wanted to work in the same big international/worldwide company as me, not the other way around. It was her CV she had sent to my manager, and it was Her Royal Highness herself who showed up at my office for the interview... . Unfortunately, the dream of my reality that she wanted was shattered, since she was a rejected applicant. Oh wait...I forgot - she was only checking out the place for her imaginary friend... . Sorry, my bad.

On top of the current job she has now, she also works an extra job on occasional weekends approximately every 3 months to earn more money for luxury. I one the other hand, just need 1 job to be able to live the same (or better). So again, no envy on my part, since I do like my weekends to be work-free.

3. Their car
When you live in the middle of freakin' nowhere, and work in the middle of freakin' nowhere, a car becomes a necessity. Since Martin and I live and work in trendy Copenhagen, we do not need a car. If we do decide to buy 1, it would be for luxurious reasons, not for necessity. Nice to have, but not need to have. However, can we afford to buy a car? Of course! We can pay for 1 in cold hard cash right now if we wanted to. But why would I want to waste money on a depreciating piece of metal which will merely be scrap in a matter of years?

Is that something for me to envy about? No. You see, though we don't own a car, what we do own is something worth way more than it - we have instead a holiday apartment right in the heart of Sunny Beach, Bulgaria! 62 sqm, brand new 2-room apartment, 10 mins walk to the beach, swimming pool and BBQ area just downstairs, 24-hr security service. If you want to talk about investment and using money wisely, then we talk about property, not cars.

4. Their travels
I love travelling, so I'll put this on "envy" list since I would be envious of someone who has travelled a LOT! But are Yellow Goddess and Bil that person? Unfortunately, no. Let's just look at the countries where they as a couple have travelled to and where we as a couple have travelled to for as long as I've known them:

Yellow Goddess+Bil
1. Spain, 2. Norway, 3. Sweden, 4. England, 5. Italy, 6. China, 7. Canada

Sheila+Martin:
1. Norway, 2. Sweden, 3. Finland, 4. England, 5. The Netherlands, 6. Singapore, 7. Malaysia, 8. Thailand, 9. Brazil, 10. Germany, 11. Latvia, 12. France, 13. Belgium, 14. Bulgaria (flights confirmed), 15. Italy (flights confirmed)

Er...did I lose them somewhere??? Am so far ahead that they seem quite a distance away behind... . No envy there.

Human
1. Her husband/their marriage
So she feels that I should be afraid of Martin discarding me 1 fine day after finding someone better? The truth is, it's the other way around - he's actually more afraid of me discarding him than I am of him discarding me. You see, Martin tells me all the time that he would not be able to live if I should ever leave him. I on the other hand, hardly ever say the same to him.

I think it's because I had forgiven him so much already in the past before our marriage and still continued to love him despite the wrongs he had done against me, that I've arrived at a place of inner peace within myself when it comes to my love for him. Therefore, if he should ever choose to leave me, I know I will still be able to live, simply because I make sure that my life is not dependent on his love for me.

Anyway, her husband ain't no angel himself when it comes to Asian women. Oh yes, I had seen the way he turned to ogle over an Asian girl who walked past him once when we were on the way to the fitness club last year (I was walking behind him, while Martin and 1 of Bil's friends were engaged in conversation). Man, his eyes were as big as saucers, and saliva was coming out of his mouth like a hungry wolf when I saw the expression on his face when pretty Asian girl walked by.

"You have heard that it is said that you should not commit adultry, But I say to you, whoever looks at a woman with lust in his heart, already has committed adultry in his heart." Matt. 5:27.

On top of that, who is the 1 who had always been sending my husband photos of random Asian women either by MMS or email? That's right - Bil. Was he trying to show off his "catch" or something? His prized trophies? Is 7 long years of marriage to the same woman boring him totally to death that he has to look hungrily outside the fence at the meat he can't chew on? Some women believe that in order to keep their men from leaving them, they should bear his child.

So...me envious of their marriage? Highly unlikely. Besides, I didn't marry my husband so that the Danish government won't kick me back to my motherland; she did.

2. Herself
Hmm...she mentioned my "lack of appearance", so I assume that I should be envious of hers. Hell, no! I don't consider ghostly-looking flat heads with flat thin hair, slanty dropy eyes, lack of eyebrows and curly eye-lashes, big round nose, thinly pursed lips, flat butt and roundish flabby tummies as a standard for beauty, especially when these features are sadly ALL on 1 person!

I've got a nice Indian-hertitage tan which Danes and most white people envy (I've been told several times), a head which is not flat, long lustrous and volumously thick hair which both guys AND girls like, I've got double eye-lids which enable me to put on eyeshadow, eyebrows which I can pluck and shape to my desire instead of pencil-drawing them on, curly eye-lashes (again thanks to my Indian heritage), full pouty lips without needing the help of botox, sexy round butt (as I've been told several times by men other than Martin, although only Martin's allowed to touch ;oP), and a flat tummy. I don't like my nose that much, but hey, though I'm not perfect, I'm not so imperfect that I would wish to look like someone as her who isn't even close to what I consider "beautiful".

Age-wise, I don't get why she's even calling me "old", when she's just 1 year and 3 months younger! Is her math really so bad that she can't calculate and see how insignificant the difference is? Oh, right....I forgot - she may (soon) be 29 years old, but in her mind, she's only 19. No wonder I seem like an old woman to her ;o). I remember when I was 19, how I thought 30 year old women were old too. The truth is, they're not old at all. Mature, yes - compared to a 19 year old, but old? No.

So....me envious of her? Big no! I'm sure she wishes I was, though.

3. Their son
Last on my so-called "envy list" - their son. She challenged that if I have the guts, then I should produce my own. Is that the reason to have a child? Guts? I thought you should have kids only when you are ready to have kids, not whether you have guts to do it or not.

I didn't even realise that I've been wanting a child when all this while I've been telling people that I don't! Is my "twin" out there telling you guys how I desparately want a child or something??? If she is, please shut her up because I really do not want to be a mum (right now, and maybe even ever) and Martin doesn't want to be a dad.

Yellow Goddess waited 6 years in her marriage before producing a child (whether planned or by accident, that's another story). I'm only on my 3rd year, so what's the rush? Oh...it's because I'm "old"....I get it... .

"I reckon it’s because she has too many sins, so even when she wants to give birth she just can’t." wrote Yellow Goddess.

Well...how about I tell you this: "If any one of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone at (me)." John 8:7.

To put it simply, EVERY SINGLE WOMAN who has ever given birth on planet Earth managed to do so even though they've had little or many sins in their lives....and Yellow Goddess is no heavenly exception. Even virgin mother Mary was, by definition, a sinner. So the number of sins and the ability to give birth are correlated? What a laugh! If this is really the case, then I'll be giving birth to TRIPLETS if Yellow Goddess managed even 1 child from her own sinful ways.

So am I envious of her Buddha son? Definitely not...since I don't see any logical reason to be envious of "something" I don't even want!

***************

You see how utterly difficult it is for me to be remotely envious of her? I'm still trying to find my "enlightment" on this. Oh what can it be....what can it be???

I can only conclude that the real envious person is really she... . No wonder she's hoping and looking forward to the death of my marriage with so much vigour, and hoping even for my own death:

"没有人事情做得比她好，那她就自己做啊，做死她好了，她这个死劳碌命！"
"Seems that nobody does things better than her, then she should just do them herself, better still, do until she dies, damn this workaholic woman!"

There's a name for such an unheathly kind of envy as displayed by her. It's called "malignant envy". In "malignant envy" we intend to destroy the object of envy.


Endnote:
I wrote earlier that "I'm not interested at all about her thoughts about me since I don't value her shallow, illogical opinions at all." She may also write out her opinions of Martin as negatively as she wants to and I won't even blink an eye. However, for her to accuse my husband of possibly having an affair today with his Thai ex-lover goes BEYOND despicable.

For example:

"21 July
听说她的宝贝兔子前日遇到他的泰国前任... "
"I heard her precious rabbit ran into his Thai ex-lover the day before yesterday... "
(she "heard" from who? The voices in her head???)

"10 Sept
看来两人的关系不佳,快要走到尽头了.不知是不是因为她宝贝兔子的泰国情人和他又在网上取得了联系?"
"Seems like these 2 people's relationship is not excellent, soon going to reach the end already, don't know if it's because her precious rabbit's Thai lover and him have obtained their online relations again?"

Bil had been proudly telling Martin that Yellow Goddess would never stoop to my level. He's right, she didn't stoop to my level at all. She went way below it! Again I say: malignant envy.

Yay! No cavities!

I finally pulled myself together to go visit my dentist today. I had been procrastinating this for almost 2 years now, and it had been pricking on my conscience every now and then. I mean, who of you out there actually look forward to visit your dentist? The childhood fear lives on in adulthood, doesn't it? And not without reason either.

If I may be openly honest with you, the longest time I had allowed to pass without visiting the dentist is actually....12 years!!! You see, from the time I started primary school at age 7 in Singapore till the time I finished secondary school at age 16, it was compulsory to visit the school's dentist twice a year, and for free. I never enjoyed the experience, so after graduating, it was "goodbye dentist" for me.

Besides, I never really knew how to go about finding a dentist, plus they cost a lot, plus I didn't really think much about something which should happen only twice a year. Come to think of it, I'm actually quite fortunate to still have all my teeth intact ;o). My gums did suffer a bit though, so it is important to go for your regular check-ups if you don't want to lose your pearlies.

Martin has actually beaten my record on this; I think his last visit to the dentist is 15 years, and still counting! I keep telling him to make that vital appointment before it gets too late and before it starts costing a fortune to correct things he could have avoided. Imagine if I wake up 1 day to find a lot of empty room in his mouth when I kiss him good morning! Of course such a thing like this could actually happen, but I'm hoping it will be only 50 years from now and not 5 years from now... . I mean, I know he's my big baby and all, but I really don't hope he takes it literally because only real babies can get away with no teeth on their gums.

My dental clinic is just a couple of units down the street from my office, so I can easily pop by for ½hr-45mins during working hours and then back again. Yes, I am actually allowed to use some of my working hours to visit the dentist. Anyway, I had a new dentist attending to me today, and he was really pleasant. I was a little shy at 1st of having a young guy looking into the nasties in my mouth (good I went there before eating my breakfast), but then again, it's not my fault if he chose such an eye-opening profession so I kinda got over that quickly.

Was there pain? I'd be lying if I say "no", but he did do his best not to torture me too much, so it was bearable enough for me to go out of there alive. Besides, they need me to pay for the services anyway, so they had better keep me alive. Just a couple of times it did hurt, but I guess there's no way out if it if your dentist is using an instrument like this:

The hook instrument of course, not the mirror. Duh!

Man, I really dislike that menacing-looking hook. That, and the machine look-alike one too. Oh well, like they say, no pain no gain, so in the end, it was good to get it over and done with....at least till the next appointment in 6 months. Teeth felt so clean, that I wish I didn't have to eat anything for the rest of the day just to enjoy the clean feeling. And yay! I've been declared "cavity-free"!

Anyway, I just hope that the 2 wisdom teeth in my lower jaw will NEVER see the light of day. I heard it can be really painful to get those extracted. I had already gotten the 2 upper ones pulled out, and though they weren't so bad as I had expected, I still wouldn't like to have needles poking into my gums to administer the anethesia. So yeah, if these teeth of mine are as wise as their name says they are, they'll know not to pop out in my mouth. Otherwise, I will revoke their so-called "wise" status in a blink of my eye. How's that for a threat, wise guys?

Girls only weekend

We should definitely have an extra day in the weekend - 2 days are not enough! Who came up with a 5 day work week anyway?

I went out with 3 girlfriends yesterday, first to watch the football Euro 2008 qualifying match between Denmark and Sweden (it was a draw this time at 0-0), and then to dance the night away at K3 (the former gay club). I didn't like K3 previously because they only played techno/house music the 1st time I was there, but since it was an organised party we went to, we didn't really have a choice with the night party location, so K3 it was. Good thing though, is that we didn't have to pay the cover charge since we were guests at this organised party, so that's why I was willing to give that place a 2nd chance... .

I must say that it was FUN this time! The lower floor played techno/house music, but the upper floor was playing proper normal music! Music I like dancing to, at least. Probably because it was a Saturday, compared to previously when I was there on a Friday.

Unfortunately, it did get to a point later on in the night where there became far too many people dancing on the far too small dance floor, so it wasn't much fun towards the end since you can't really dance properly apart from maybe 2 small steps to the right and 2 small steps to the left. I mean, that's not even called walking! Also, you get pushed around a lot instead, which isn't so pleasant. In fact 2 guys had even started to have a 1 on 1 fist fight with each other while Wagma and I were dancing! If that was a new kind of dance move, it certainly looked like a violent 1. Tsk....men.

Anyway, it was a fun night with good company, good music, and an ok football match result.

3 beauties (from left): Alice from China, Ivy from China and Wagma from Denmark with Afghanistan roots

Some lucky guy won that scooter (but without the blond) at a raffle draw. I doubt that I would dare to ride that machine home anyway, if I had won it. I prefer cars ;o).

Couching out a bit before we continued to K3

Me and Ivy

On Sunday, which is today, Ivy invited us over to her place for dinner. She and Wagma are actually renting rooms next to each other in a big house in Charlottenlund, a pretty poshy area in greater Copenhagen, so we were quite a few girls tonight since 2 of Wagma girlfriends joined us too.

Ivy was the cook of the day, and believe it or not, that petite girl gave us a FEAST of a lifetime! She made us 10 different Chinese dishes, PLUS dessert!!! They were all wonderfully presented as well. My goodness, none of us were expecting such royal treatment at all! The best part though, was that they all tasted excellent! We girls really had a good time, made new friends with each other, and just clicked so well that we agreed to all meet up again soon.

Well, here are pictures fresh from the camera tonight:

This was just ½ of our sinful feast

From left: Alice, Wagma, Gitte (Korean), Anne Lee (Korean) and moi

Helping with the dishes. Well, I was actually just bringing in a used fork.

Hmm...come to think of it, we should have used the self-timer to take a picture with ALL of us together! Now Anne Lee is missing from this pic.

Happy 3 friends

I don't think a "guys only" gathering will be quite as fun as a "girls only gathering". I mean, they'll probably just eat pizza, drink beer, maybe play some video games, and get drunk. But we girls...we get proper food (or a feast, if you go visit Ivy), we do our girl talk / girl bonding, exchange useful information like recipes, goof around a bit (ok, a lot) with our cameras, laugh together, cry together....I mean, I'm talking about getting deep here... ;o).

Ok...I think I lost the guys somewhere after "play some video games, and get drunk."

Pictures from Diana and Seth's wedding at last!

We took more than 200 pictures on that eventful day, but I will put up selected ones here... .

Here comes the bride, all dressed in white...

Me and the beautiful bride

Her smittened husband

Mmm....cake.

My hubby looking smashing!

African dancer performing for us

The talented drummers

Emilie and Martin - she's 189cm tall and Martin's 187cm!

Beyoncé. Ok, just kidding. She's called Yazzmin (I think). Really good voice she had.

Martin and me

Yay! Cake time!

Dancing with his bride

Happy feet!

Everybody dance now!

Human Torch and his lady

She caught the bride's bouquet!