I read an article once which said that Danish men make good husbands. It had something to do with that most Danish men (there are exceptions, of course) help out with the household chores and with bringing up the kids. I don't know yet about the part of helping to bring up the kids since we have none, but concerning sharing the load of household chores, I do agree.
However, being "equal" is not the same as being "the same". Let's face it - men and women, though "equal", are not eg. physically "the same". We don't always think in the same way either.
That is why I do not like radical feminism that takes the "equality" fight a bit out of context... . Why can't a man be allowed to open doors for us? Or carry our heavy grocery bags? Or pull out the chair for us before we sit at the table? Do we have to snap at them and tell them that we are capable of doing these ourselves? C´mon, give the gentleman a break! Saying "Thanks," with a smile is way easier (and kinder) than a frown and some angry words... . I mean, if we really want to be equal and the same, then how about finding a way to make men take ½ of the pregnancy period too?! Nature won't allow us to do so, right? Then let's just allow them to open the door for us and carry the heavy bags, okay? Otherwise whatever muscle they have left in them will just become fats.
So yeah, even though Danish men make good husbands because they share an equal role at home with their wives, they don't make very good gentlemen. I'm not talking so much about male friends who know you personally, since they would normally be polite and gentlemanly anyway as friends should be to each other. However, the average male stranger in the street may not always hold the door open for a lady stranger, or offer a lady stranger the next available seat in the bus if both are standing close to it. I've experienced doors almost slamming in my face, and guys just quickly resting their butts on bus seats the minute the opportunity allows them to, without bothering to ask any ladies close by first if they'd like to have it.
I don't blame them entirely for losing their gentlemanly manners since Danish women want to show that they are "equally" strong enough to open the doors themselves, or "equally" capable of standing throughout the bus trip. If I were a guy who gets a lecture of women equality instead of just sweet and simple "Thanks," then I'll probably just think for myself too.
"Hmm....my woman wants to show that she's as strong as me, well, let her take the heavier load then!"
"Wow...she did pretty good last time, so let's increase her load!"
"It's great to be a man these days! Our women do ALL the work, AND are still the ones getting pregnant! Suckers!"Anyway...it's good that Martin is gentlemanly enough... . Ok, he doesn't always open/hold the door for me to let me pass through first, but at least he always carries the grocery bags whenever we are out shopping for food together... . If we have 1 bag, he takes the 1 bag. If we have 2 bags, he takes the 2 bags. If we have 3 bags, he wants to know if we're having a party or something... ;o). No, just kidding; then I take the lightest bag.
Women however, should not overdo this and think that "my husband should carry ALL my bags, no matter what bag it is." Imagine making your husband carry your feminine handbag for you! It's not cool, and it makes him look like 2 things: gay, or a slave. Give the man some pride! Just because it is eg. very normal in China for a guy to carry the handbags of the goddesses there does not mean that it is therefore cool for him to do so. Not there, and especially not here in the west where it would seem highly abnormal! A man-bag/purse would probably be better for him to carry around then (if it looks less feminine than an actual female handbag, that is)... .
Rule of thumb: it is okay for a man to hold his woman's handbag for a short time when needed (eg. if she needs to buckle her shoes, or go to the ladies at a public place while he waits for her, or put on her winter coat, or try something on in the changing room), but he has pretty much burnt his manhood at the stake by carrying the handbag for her while she's doing nothing but simply walking next to him! When I see such a thing, I don't think "Wow, she really knows how to train her man!". What I do think instead, is "That man is so henpecked that he's not a rooster anymore but a hen!"
Anyway ladies - if your handbag's too heavy for you to carry yourself, then empty it and see what you don't need to have with you. Half the contents are probably junk anyway. If it's still heavy, then you have 2 options: bear the weight of your own load, or change the handbag to a more manly backpack or laptop-looking bag if you intend your man to carry it for you.
